Basic Fucking Kindness – Telegram
Basic Fucking Kindness
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The Alembic Collective ⚗️ (@Alembic)
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labels, neurodivergency, mental illness

"i really don't like the way that some of you treat an official diagnosis as the Only Way people can be "allowed" or whatever to be adhd/autistic/neurodivergent. For some of us, getting an official diagnosis is a pipe dream for the distant future. i need help now. And second, the medical industry is not made of necessarily of unilaterally objective people. Gender and race can play a huge part in getting diagnosed. Some people get diagnosed when there is ultimately something different at play or nothing at all. Some people don't get diagnosed because the accepted symptoms are not made to fit us. But we know our own bodies and we know our brains. Yes, getting diagnosed is good. But it is not the end all be all, nor is it necessary a good way to determine who has a mental illness and who doesn't."
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growth, healing

"what we think healing will look like

what healing actually looks like"
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relationships

"Relationship Green lights:

~ They apologize when they are wrong.

~ Their words and behaviors align.

~ They encourage your connections with others (friends, family).

~ They speak about their ex-partners with respect.

~ They communicate clearly and honestly.

~ They set, honor, and respect boundaries.

~ They show up authentically and offer you space to do the same.

~ They are intentional about resolving conflict.

~ They are actively working on growth and healing.

~ They share compatible goals for the relationship.

~ They make you feel see, heard, and appreciated.
"
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language, discrimination, socialization, theory

"i'm gonna say this because it's been on my mind for a while: a lot of people on here are ridiculous with why they call posts ableist.

like, someone will make post on the importance of showing kindness and use the term "empathy" and some clearly extremely bored person will jump on the post yelling at them for being ableist towards people with disorders that involve a lack of empathy. in pretty much all these instances op literally just didn't know there’s a difference between empathy and compassion since the terms are used in the same way often. why the fuck can't you just nicely clarify the difference instead of screenshotting posts and making a damn callout? why can no one on here communicate? you don't even come across as someone who cares about social issues, just a self-victimizing asshole."
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religion, society, lgbt, oppression

"the word "homosexuality" wasnt added in the bible until 1946
[...]
the way leviticus 18:22 is truly written is "man shall not lie with young boys as he does with a woman, for it is an abomination"
"
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labels, neurodivergency

"PSA from the actual coiner of "neurodivergent"

Yo. Many of you need to take an entire stadium of seats. Like a football arena in Texas number.

i coined neurodivergent before tumblr was even a thing, like a decade or more ago, because people were using 'neurodiverse' and 'neurodiversity' to just mean autistic, & possibly LDs. But there's more, like way more, ways a person can have a different yet fucking perfect dammit brain.

Neurodivergent refers to neurologically divergent from typical. That's ALL.

i am multiply neurodivergent: I'm Autistic, epileptic, have PTSD, have cluster headaches, have a chiari malformation.

Neurodivergent just means a brain that diverges.

Autistic people. ADHD people. People with learning disabilities. Epileptic people. People with mental ilinesses. People with MS or Parkinsons or apraxia or cerebral palsy or dyspraxia or no specific diagnosis but wonky lateralization or something.

That is all it means. It is not another damn tool of exclusion. It is specifically a tool of inclusion. If you don't want to be associated with Those People, then YOU are the one who needs another word. Neurodivergent is for all of us.

Annoyedly yours,
Neurodivergent K of Radical Neurodivergence Speaking"
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lgbt, self compassion, socialization, mental health

"literally hate how lgbtq ppl are constantly asking "am i valid?" "is this a valid way to be?" every 5 seconds. girl idk what to tell you but if you live your life seeking validation from others your self-image will always exist at their mercy. you gotta get some self-respect and stop begging others to validate you"
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self compassion, rest

"Remember: Resting isn't transactional.

You don't need to do anything special or extra difficult to deserve a break.

You don't need to reach a certain goalpost of suffering and exhaustion before you're allowed time off.

Resting for a day doesn't mean that you're obligated to work twice as hard the next day.

Humans need variety. Humans need quiet time. Humans need time to "shut off", whatever that looks like for them.

You're allowed to be human. You're allowed a break. Don't burn yourself out, okay?"
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society, abuse, school, parenting

"
"Children don't need to earn their humanity. Children aren't humans in training, they are humans right now. They're not waiting to live their life, this is part of their life in this moment. Society treats children as though they're preparing for a time where they're allowed respect - and not before then. Until that time it's acceptable to treat them as sub-human under the guise of parenting and education. For many, parenting is synonymous with punishment and learning is synonymous with schooling which are both so far off the mark. This all comes down to childism and it is so deeply sewn into the fabric our society. So much so that talking about it creates such cognitive dissonance that i know I'll get defensive, even angry comments sharing these thoughts. People who genuinely respectfully parent and speak up for the injustices towards kids are so often ridiculed. Like I've said in the past, i don't want to be viewed as a 'good parent' by a society that thinks so little of children."

— How Many Well Intentioned People Dehumanise Children "
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abortion, rights, society, oppression

"Here's the thing, guys.

It doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter when life begins.

It doesn't matter whether a fetus is a human being or ot

That entire argument is a red herring, a distraction, a subjective and unwinnable argument that could not matter less.

It doesn't matter whether we're talking about a fertized egg, or a fetus, or a baby, or a five year old, or a Nobel Prize winning paediatric oncologist

NOBODY has the right to use your body, against your will, even to save their life, or the life of another person

That's it
That's the argument

You cannot be forced to donate blood, or marrow, or organs, even though thousands die every year, on waiting lists

They cannot even harvest your organs after your death without your explicit written, pre-mortem permission.

Denying women the right to abortion means we have less bodily autonomy than a corpse"
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chronic pain, disabilities, invisible problems

"i love to use my disability "as an excuse." Fuck yeah my disability is an excuse. It's the most valid excuse i have. im not helping you lift that box/etc because my disability would make it fucking painful. Not wanting to be in pain is a good enough reason. I'm not going to put myself in pain to comfort your sensibilities.

Yes I'm using my disability as an excuse because i refuse to hurt myself for you. If you're mad about it you can cry!

Happy disability pride month.

In honor of my chronic pain flareup that i could've avoided by asking my wife for help here's your reminder to say no to stuff when it is safe to do so!! Ask for help!!

This month practice saying "I can't do that. It would hurt me" or "can I have help with (x)?" Start with a friend or family member who you feel comfortable asserting your boundaries with and keep saying no."
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disabilities, invisible problems, mental health

"
"I'm not disabled, but i feel like i can relate to your disability content because of my depression/anxiety/ PTSD/etc"

Oh friend, i have some news for you whenever you're emotionally ready to hear it...

Gentle reminder that a disability is defined as any medical condition that impacts your ability to function and/or interact with the world around you.

The severity of anyone else's disability is irrelevant.

And disability doesn't look any specific way.

Please don't deprive yourself of community (and accommodations!!) because you're worried that you're not "disabled enough" to take up space here.
"
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language, words, abuse

"what is gaslighting?
when someone intentionally twists your perception of reality for their own gain"
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abuse, relationships, socialization, mental health

"victims of abuse be like, this person has now made me cry myself to sleep about 30 times [...] but maybe that's just me"
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intimacy, socialization, relationships, mental health, lgbt (aro/ace), society

"no offence but i think a lot of us me included dont actually want romantic love as bad as we think and really are just lonely and crave closeness and intimacy that feels out of reach in friendships"
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mental health, parenting, society

"if you suffered in life and want other people to suffer as you did because "you turned out fine," you did not in fact turn out fine"
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socialization

"before you argue with someone, ask yourself, is that person even mentally mature enough to grasp the concept of different perspectives? because if not, there is absolutely no point"
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borderline, mental illness

"i think one of the worst symptoms of bpd is the lack of emotional permeance [permanence]"
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socialization

"the world is not kind
that is why we must be kind in its place"

{art by anelien}[?]
#help_wanted
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unscheduled post: remember to drink water :)
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disabilities, cyberpunk, capitalism

"every time someone starts telling that they wanna supplement their body with computer parts im just like okay great but dont cry to me when your memories of loved ones or your ability to run are locked behind paywalls

[...]cochlear implants[...]

cyberpunk dystopia is already here for the disabled

i want all the abled people reading this to go price check a power wheel chair"
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