In this age of denying gender differences, this is often a huge blind spot for modern people.

What you as a new wife might find weird or offputting about your new husband could be just a male trait, not exclusive to your particular husband but something all men have. Same for the husband who might be baffled by something his new wife does, not realizing that it's just a woman thing, not exclusive to his wife.

So in the beginning, is it any wonder that the new husband and wife will often butt heads, fight over a lot of small things, argue daily?

We shouldn't be surprised.

We should know this ahead of time and adjust our expectations going into marriage, so that when the first fight occurs, we don't instantly think, "Omg, divorce!"

Knowing that problems are natural for this initial phase of marriage, despite the misleading name of "honeymoon phase," can help us stay patient and unperturbed.

So hang in there. Give yourself a real chance to find out who your spouse actually is in reality, outside the fantasies in your head.

We don't marry the person we marry; we marry our *idea* of the person, who we *think* this person is. It is inly after marriage that you start to slowly find out who you actually married. And inevitably, this person will fall short of the perfection you had hoped for in your mental image of him or her.

And that's okay. You're not perfect either. Nobody is.

After fourteen years of marriage alhamdulillah, this is the biggest piece of advice I'd give to newlyweds. Give the marriage TIME.

Marriage gets so much better, so much more beautiful and harmonious and hilarious with time, as you assimilate to one another, grow together, build memories, and develop your own inside jokes. Don't quit too soon. Resist Shaytan's plot to separate husband and wife by giving yourselves time and being committed.

May Allah grant all Muslims beautiful, long-lasting marriages, ameen.

Umm khalid
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Dear brothers and sisters in Islam, tomorrow is the 9th of Muharram and the day following, Monday 8th August is the day of 'Ashura, the blessed 10th of Muharram.

Here are some reasons why we wouldn't want to miss fasting on the day of 'Ashura 👇
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Don't miss out on the great blessings affiliated with the fasting on the 10th of Allah's Month. In Sha Allah, our sins of the previous year will be removed. May Allah accept our good deeds from us.
آمين
The day of 'Ashura is 10th of Muharram. However, we are expected to fast a day before it, in order to differ from the Jews.
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