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Spirituality and purity
Rev. Dr. Marek Dziewiecki

A lasting and happy marriage is based primarily on love, not on lust or sexual intercourse. That is why the condition for honest preparation for marriage is spiritual development, without which tender and pure love is not possible. Living in purity during the period of falling in love and engagement is – like everything noble and good – a difficult task for every person. It requires vigilance, determination and fidelity to the norms contained in the Decalogue.

Difficulties in maintaining chastity result not only from the currently dominant low culture, which focuses man on his body and desires, but also from the weaknesses that every man experiences after original sin. Chastity in the male-female relationship is impossible, and even incomprehensible to spiritually superficial people, because their "master" is the body, and the main motive of action in contact with persons of the opposite sex is the pursuit of satisfying the desire and seeking immediate pleasure at any price. Also at the price of impurity and sin.

Only a person with deep spirituality, who understands that love is realized through relationship of persons, not the contact of their bodies, is capable of faithful, tender and pure love. For a carnal person, tenderness is only a means to an end.
It is a pretext used to enter the next phases of physical closeness unnoticed, to seek ever stronger stimuli, to gradually lead to a situation in which the appearance of tenderness will change into an open lust of the flesh. Whoever, during the period of love and engagement, does not enjoy what is intellectual and spiritual in the other person, that is, invisible and physically intangible, seeks physical, superficial pleasure, which quickly passes and becomes addictive. Such a person confuses love with flirting and romancing.

A carnal person is unable to aspire to anything more than immediate pleasure. He decides to do what is physically pleasurable, even at the cost of his own conscience and harming the other person. Such a person is increasingly frustrated, because any form of physical pleasure in contact with a person of the other sex that is not connected with pure and selfless love quickly passes, leaving a sense of emptiness and anxiety. A carnal person does not know that empathizing with the thoughts and experiences of the other person, respecting their dreams and aspirations, helping them to realize their potential and ideals that attract them, brings incomparably greater joy.

Thanks to growing in faith, a person becomes able to see a person even when they only see their body. On the other hand, someone deprived of spiritual depth focuses only on the contact of bodies. A spiritual person is able to love and communicate love from any distance, that is, even when at a given moment there is no physical contact with the loved one.

Preparing for marriage is a matter of spiritual development, without which no one will learn to love tenderly and irrevocably. Physical intimacy is one of the important ways of communicating tender, intimate love in a fiancée or a spouse. However, it is a pure intimacy.

The text was published in July/2014 issue of magazine"Egzorcysta"

#love #purity

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