"To deliver gifts to every child, Santa must travel incredibly fast, roughly 4.7 to 5.4 million kilometers per hour (3 million mph), which is about 0.5% the speed of light, requiring him to visit ~1,900 houses per second, but using time zones and relativity allows for magical solutions, like stopping time or using multiple sleighs, otherwise, air resistance would vaporize him."

> travels 0.5% speed of light
> no fancy tech, just reindeer
> defies laws of physics
> visits 1900 homes per second
> no one knows how it's possible
> isn't instantly vaporized

Through Christ anything is possible

6,000,000 cookies is impossible. Not Santa

Don't make me repeat myself

blow that grinchy head smoove off

Apparently this is "nigger" in the Predator language, from the movies

wish all budies many more years to come in peace

Is a yule log just Santa's shit after a long night of eating cookies and milk?