“Character,” Joan Didion would write in one of her best essays, “the willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life—is the source from which self-respect springs.” Marcus is urging us not to waste time complaining about what we haven’t got or how things have worked out. We have to quit monkeying around and be the owners of our own lives.

Character can be developed, and when it is, self-respect will ensue. But that means starting and getting serious about it. Not later, not after certain questions have been answered or distractions dealt with, but now. Right now. Taking responsibility is the first step.

To be without this character is the worst of all fates. As Didion put it in “On Self-Respect,” “To live without self-respect is to lie awake some night, beyond the reach of warm milk, the phenobarbital, and the sleeping hand on the coverlet, counting up the sins of commission and omission, the trusts betrayed, the promises subtly broken, the gifts irrevocably wasted through sloth or cowardice or carelessness.” You’re so much better than that.

Shabbat shalom

Ma shlomkhem

THE PHILOSOPHER KING

“For I believe a good king is from the outset and by necessity a philosopher, and the philosopher is from the outset a kingly person.”
—MUSONIUS RUFUS, LECTURES, 8.33.32–34

The Israeli general Herzl Halevi believes that philosophy is essential in his role as a leader and warrior. “People used to tell me that business administration is for the practical life and philosophy is for the spirit,” he said. “Through the years I found it is exactly the opposite—I used philosophy much more practically.” War and leadership offer an unending series of ethical decisions that require priorities, balance, and clarity. That’s what philosophy helps with.

Plato knew this when he imagined a utopia ruled by a philosopher king. “Either philosophers should become kings,” he said in The Republic, “or those now called kings should truly and sufficiently undertake philosophy.” Marcus Aurelius was quite literally that philosopher king. What does that have to do with you?

There are fewer kings these days, but we’re all leaders in one way or another—of families, of companies, of a team, of an audience, of a group of friends, of ourselves. It’s the study of philosophy that cultivates our reason and ethics so that we can do our job well. We can’t just wing it—too many people are counting on us to do it right.

Love the confidence and we need more of this kind of character

woman is born with beauty. A man is born with potential.

That’s the uncomfortable truth.

From the moment a girl hits 18, the world opens up to her.
Attention. Options. Opportunities.
Simply for existing.

Why?

Because female value is front-loaded.
It's biological. Evolutionary.
Youth and beauty are desired.

But a man?

He’s ignored at 18.
Laughed at at 22.
Overlooked at 25.
Only respected when he builds something.

A man’s value is earned.
Through suffering.
Through mastery.
Through becoming something the world can’t ignore.

This is why a man’s life truly begins at 30—
If he used his 20s to build, sharpen, sacrifice.

So stop crying about the game being unfair.
The rules were never designed for your comfort.

They were designed to forge you.

She protects what she has.
You must build what you don’t.

Every rep, every book, every lonely night—it all counts.

Become dangerous.

Then watch how the world finally says your name with respect.

Are you ready to build that kind of value?

Boys be a #men!!!!!

LOVE THE HUMBLE ART

“Love the humble art you have learned, and take rest in it. Pass through the remainder of your days as one who whole-heartedly entrusts all possessions to the gods, making yourself neither a tyrant nor a slave to any person.”
—MARCUS AURELIUS, MEDITATIONS,

Stop by a comedy club any weekend night in New York or Los Angeles and you’re likely to find some of the world’s biggest and most commercially successful comedians in there, workshopping their craft for just a handful of people. Though they make a fortune in movies or on the road, there they are, practicing the most basic form of their art.

If you ask any of them: “Why are you doing this? Why do you still perform?” The answer is usually: “Because I’m good at it. Because I love it. Because I want to get better. Because I thrive on connecting with an audience. Because I just can’t not do it.” It’s not work for them to get up on stage at Carolines or the Comedy Cellar at 1 a.m.

It’s invigorating. They don’t have to do it. They’re free, and they choose this. Whatever humble art you practice: Are you sure you’re making time for it? Are you loving what you do enough to make the time? Can you trust that if you put in the effort, the rest will take care of itself?

Because it will. Love the craft, be a craftsman.

THE START-UP OF YOU

“But what does Socrates say? ‘Just as one person delights in improving his farm, and another his horse, so I delight in attending to my own improvement day by day.’”
—EPICTETUS, DISCOURSES, 3.5.14

T he rage these days is to start your own company—to be an entrepreneur. There is no question, building a business from scratch can be an immensely rewarding pursuit. It’s why people put their whole lives into doing it, working countless hours and taking countless risks.

But shouldn’t we be just as invested in building ourselves as we would be to any company?

Like a start-up, we begin as just an idea: we’re incubated, put out into the world where we develop slowly, and then, over time, we accumulate partners, employees, customers, investors, and wealth. Is it really so strange to treat your own life as seriously as you might treat an idea for a business? Which one really is the matter of life and death?

Ecclesiastes 12:1-3 ASV
[1] Remember also thy Creator in the days of thy youth, before the evil days come, and the years draw nigh, when thou shalt say, I have no pleasure in them; [2] before the sun, and the light, and the moon, and the stars, are darkened, and the clouds return after the rain; [3] in the day when the keepers of the house shall tremble, and the strong men shall bow themselves, and the grinders cease because they are few, and those that look out of the windows shall be darkened,

 "Free will is the sensation of making a choice. The sensation is real, but the choice seems illusory"
Brian Greene

SOME SIMPLE RULES

“In your actions, don’t procrastinate. In your conversations, don’t confuse. In your thoughts, don’t wander. In your soul, don’t be passive or aggressive. In your life, don’t be all about business.”

—MARCUS AURELIUS, MEDITATIONS,

Simple is rarely easy. But now that you have these rules, make it your duty to put them into practice— with the first item on your to-do list, with the first conversation you have, with your soul, and, of course, with the life you make for yourself. Not just today, but every day. Write that on the blackboard and don’t forget it.