literally never beating the gay accusations with a cum stain on his shirt

how i look at the cashier when she asks me if I want a receipt for a 12 pack of beer

I've eaten things you people wouldn't believe.
A pack of chips deep fried with a pizza soaked in brine.
I had pee streams glitter in the dark with fluorescent food dye.
All those calories will be lost in fat.
Like beers down the drain.
Time to die.
[has a heart attack]