i missed so many big events this weeks. at this point my primary news source are telegram memes, and i wasnt looking at them so...


i somehow even got too many news at once when i returned, i wasnt aware that google was down on december, that feels very 2020. or some big fires on "Europe’s biggest Could Provider" that took down a good chunk of the internet too, or other stuff. how did i miss the "10-15% of the world commerce has been paralyzed" thing, how do i do it to not hear about this things in general, is impressive

so anyway, interesting vacations. they were filled with events, thats for sure.

i tried alcohol: not good. and turns out that the nightmares are still there even if you are drunk

i tried sleeping pills, or pills in general, i dont even know what they were, and turns out that the things that would supposedly leave me completely KO gave me... a sleepless night. and the painkillers also helped me zero with pain. so it looks like i cant go that route either. both alcohol and pills are a very "no" thing for me in general, but at some point i had to try i guess.

i also uhh have a gf now. :v . i was not expecting that. she says that i sleep real bad, move too much, wake up constantly too violently, and that she can see and hear me hiperventilating and stuff and even took my pulse and it was very high, among other stuff. didnt take me by surprise really. she said that i breath diferent when im sleeping, and that did take me by surprise tho. i dislike noises so i have been all my life breathing the most silent way i can, but apparently i dont do that while sleeping. i didnt even consider that. anyway sleeping with someone to hug dont help either with the nightmares

i managed to stab myself a bit while i was sleeping. tfw knife skills are too high and you dont even need to be conscious to use them

i got gifted an isaac (from "the binding of isaac") plushie. thats very cool, honestly. i also got gifted 3d printings of my name, and that is also cool as heck

i got to sleep on some expensive bed. and i mean expensive. i could have two full time jobs right now, and all of both salaries would not be enough to pay for the matress only. for anyone curious, it is not that diferent from sleeping in a fourth hand 30€ matress lol, but it was nice. still didnt help with the nightmares.

i got to visit a beach, not a "only sand" one, and i loved the rocks. it almost made me cry. on my stupid hole of city, there arent any rocks, only concrete, and i didnt know how much i missed them. but its a lot.

i got in a very fast car (220kmh+)

i got a lot of bruises (unrelated to previous point)

i got on the wrong train. two times. and on the wrong bus one time too. trains were like two hours distance, bus was like 8. could have gone very bad lol

i learned to say chickpea on another language. very important.

i got to help someone, a ton. i like to help, im happy when the ppl around me is not having a shitty time and the feeling of usefulness is very cool

i did not eat any pepper this two weeks :d

also i got asked again by my now gf to go to live in her house. i cant remember how much time has passed since the first time she asked me, but its been years for sure. but this time i accepted and im gonna try this summer for a few months to see what it would be like

also got told by another diferent friend to do something similar in a future not so far, only that in other country, and i also consider it strongly tbh. shes also very cool, tbh, i dont get along with humans or any other creature that knows how to speak, but its way more doable to coexist with someone when its her. very "abstract idea not consolidated that would happen in some years if everything goes the way intended", but still a thing that is on my mind now


btw its forbidden to laugh at the "i did not expect to have a gf" + "shes been asking me to live with her for years" combo. its not like that.

gonna pin some post or something back now

oh and also i got to pet a street cat. a very cute one

and probably too many other things im not remembering now

i did not get to keep in touch as much as i would have liked with a certain someone that i wanted to talk to more often. that was a thing i did not like about this vacations

and also while i was out, it looks like some telegram channels changed name and pfp and im now subbed to some weird things that i have to guess wich channels were

oh, it looks like if i pin a old message, and have more recent messages pinned, the most recently posted will be priorized over the most recently pinned. that is such a shitty system. respost time then

https://www.instagram.com/p/CD1KxNqH6Uo/?igshid=1mtnc6qn4j764

This country is big time guilty of this shit.