"Waitress, can I ask you something about the menu please?"

Waitress: (slaps me across the face) The men I please are none of your damn business

"If you count numbers, your lips don't touch until you reach 1 million"

parents be like:

Father:what do you want to be when you grow up?

us: ummmm dad actually I wanna be...

Father: A DOCTOR!!

When parents say shit like ...

"Lje tolo tolo temarna asdestegn"

I mean How the fuck am i supposed to learn tolo tolo

Am i supposed to go like

Hey teacher eski tolo tolo bel gotta make my parents proud

That moment in childhood when you found out your mothers name is not actually MOM

Every time people send me screenshots:

Me:
Is that a 3G u are using?
Why does ur time say AM and not PM?
U have an unread text!
Charge ur phone Dammit!!

Zinabu meta
Tentebatebe
Yezinabu lij
....... Atebe

Those good times when the only big life decision we had to make was to say either kitun or egrun

ME: *breathes

The elderly: ዉይይይይ የ ዛሬ ልጆች

I'm "that person" if asked to wish for three wishes, would wish one of my wishes to have infinite wishes.

Don't ማሽቃበጥ by making your profile 'I love you mom' when you know your mom isn't gonna see it

So make it a confession about the ብርጭቆ you broke instead

Being naked doesn't feel as naked as being naked with socks

Time is the most wasted nonrenewable resource.

When you meet new people in real life, you unlock more characters for your dream world

We were both liars, weren't we?
You lied saying you loved me
I lied acting like I believed you.

Growing up is technically increasing the probably of dying

Nobody is busier than a person who don't want you

"Let me sneeze Ima call you back"

I've learned that making a 'living' is not the same thing as 'making a life'.
― Maya Angelou

No man is free who is not master of himself.

© Epictetus

Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood.

© Marie Curie