Wittgenstein: "what if Metaphysics was stupid and this was all a huge waste of time?"
Everyone else: "shhhhhh, what are you trying to do, put us out of a job? In this economy?"

"I was with Einstein last night, and let's just say he understood a thing or two about how long it takes for two separate bodies interact in space and time."

For Henri Bergson, there was a big distinction between time as measured by scientists (which uses motion through space to measure it) and time as experienced by human beings, which he called duration. For him, this couldn't be measured scientifically, couldn't be broken down into discreet moments, and could only be experienced. Furthermore, he emphasizes that the past and future are only imaginary states that exist in the present as thoughts, so in reality the only thing that exists is our experience of time in the present.

Some have even gone so far as to call Aristotle the first Gamer, but I'm not sure I would go that low...

Aristotle really doesn't get enough credit/blame for being the first true nerd in the history of Philosophy. Not only did he write philosophy similar to Plato, but he rigorously cataloged the natural world, more or less writing the first known books on biology/zoology. He also formalized logic, and categorized every fallacy. He also, quite strangely, went out of his way to make arguments that women (and other races) should be considered "natural slaves", i.e. obedient to people like him. No one can really say why he felt compelled to make these arguments, but one theory is that he was that kind of Nerd.

"Oh and another thing, since you've been gone we've abolished the Monarchy and organized society as an anarcho-syndicalist commune, with no hierarchy, I hope you don't mind."

I don't care how much of a "sckeptical stance" you want to take. Bruce. Lee. Is. Cool.

Big Bird: "The next letter is G. God is for God, who doesn't exist, and if God doesn't exist, that means everything is permitted..."