Thales, in the corner: "yes we are going under water, but everything is water, when you think about it, so..."

Those are the engineering vampires you dolt! After 10,000 years of philosophy, you still don't know the difference?

The theory of Occams Razors (plural): the simplest solution to any given problem is often to razor the other guy.

Ultimately of course it doesn't matter what Jesus actually teaches because people just make up what they want it to be after the fact.

Luckily when they come back they'll see that it was just a mistake, and the rest of human history is totally smart and good.

It's amazing how no philosophers have come up with the idea of "the best life is hoarding endless wealth while others toil in poverty", it's almost like it's a horrible idea.

The Lord of the Rings is considered a fantasy because the trees win the battle against industrialization.