[cc] sharing a response from a friend on how to “let go” of self-help:

1) The content I consume

I don’t read self-help / personal development anymore

I also scroll past this kind of content on IG

I just read and watch things because I enjoy them. I stopped feeling the need for everything to be productive or meaningful. I can actually say I have hobbies now — things I do for fun with no ROI

2) Stop focusing on myself

Shifting my attention to clients, the people I talk to at the gym, my grandma etc

Volunteering has helped me channel my energy towards community too

Being intentional about my relationships

4) Mindfulness practices

Meditating and running in silence has trained me to separate myself from my thoughts

There’s a difference between rumination and reflection

Your brain will always feed you thoughts, not every thought deserves your attention

5) Embracing distractions

I used to think that I always had to be present, aware of my thoughts and feelings etc

But that just led to more rumination and emotional dysregulation

In Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, we teach clients that they don’t need to feel their feelings all the time. That’s just exhausting. Distracting yourself occasionally is ok

E.g. I learned that it’s ok to scroll to turn off my mind and numb my feelings. I’d even argue that it’s been a lifeline for me when I’m in distress haha

6) Keeping myself busy

Therapists usually advise against this if it’s an avoidance strategy

But I think the opposite is also true — if you’re too free, your life feels like it lacks meaning and purpose

Which is why retirees usually end up depressed

So I became really intentional about having “side quests”

E.g. I used to read very specific research papers about non-work topics I’m curious about

I’ve been seeing lots of content about creating your own curriculum:

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DQmiEOrkWgQ/?igsh=MXNxb3Fyamp5eTA3MQ==

7) Intentionally adding novelty into my life

It can be very simple stuff:

Running a different route

Going somewhere new for a walk

Trying something new for my healthy meals

Going to a different gym

Or new experiences:

like I attended the Singapore TEDx talks with my friends last week

Joining a running club

Going to my client’s temple to attend Buddhist classes

Novelty helps you break out of living on autopilot mode

[cc]

when energy has nowhere to go but inward, it eats itself alive. purpose gives it somewhere to flow.

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DQUmbg-jMFg/?igsh=dHlveXp2OW9zOHho)

the rise of a selfish (and disconnected)society

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DRNeGvcEhv1/?igsh=dnkxOHNpNmhpcHF2

[cc]

Reading self-help content is not the only way to develop yourself as a human being

Thinking about yourself all the time ≠ growth

Doing things, living my life fully, building meaningful connections has arguably had a way bigger impact

You learn through living, not by reading and thinking about how to grow

[cc]

a growing disconnect between happiness research and self care culture

outward, not in

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DRax7UOCa8S/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link&igsh=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==

[cc]

the ego’s greatest addiction is admiration

are you growing for your inner peace or for admiration and validation?

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DRZrYWxCGYc/?igsh=dGszNWQ1NjU5Y29u

a good piece on the real poverty line

https://www.yesigiveafig.com/p/part-1-my-life-is-a-lie

Incarceration Works

https://www.city-journal.org/article/james-q-wilson-incarceration-crime

If 5% of the population contributed majority of the crime, would you execute all 5%?

death of the middle class

just as how it never existed in ancient times

[cc]

[BR]

finally finished ‘One Man’s View of the World’ by LKY

took me almost 3 months to finish this

over a decade since publication but still a great book and i have immense respect for the man

wish i was alive/ more conscious during his active years

3 more books to go by EOY!

3/5

[cc]

one of my goals for 2026 would probably to be more consistently intentional in going about life

being a more active participant in my own life

are you?

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DOCIVnlklDN/?igsh=MWl2cWJjbDRyZ3hweQ==

to want is also to lack

Sometimes if we fill that lack with something else the original want disappears entirely. Maybe you have a lack problem rather than a want problem.