Basic Fucking Kindness – Telegram
Basic Fucking Kindness
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The Alembic Collective ⚗️ (@Alembic)
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chronic illness, body, invisible problems, rest

"we need to stop thinking about disability as something that we either "allow" or "dont allow" to get in the way of shit

my disability does what it wants. and if it stops me from doing things, i cant help that

its got nothing to do with me "allowing" it to do anything"
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unrealistic age expectations, political, society, discussions

"«how would YOU fix the medical system then 😡» im 17 years old

like i dont need to be a carpenter to see that your ikea chair that impales everyone that sits on it and then shatters was put together wrong but that doesnt mean i know how to fix it"
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healing, trauma, letting go

"imagine being bitten by a snake, and instead of focusing on healing from the poison, you chase the snake to understand why it bit you and to prove that you didnt deserve it"
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invisible problems, neurodivergency

"ADHDers often feel like we "should" be able to do something because *we've done it before* or that our difficulty with focus/productivity isnt a real disability b/c sometimes we can do it just fine.

GUYS. LADIES. GENTLETHEMS.
THAT IS THE DISABILITY.
THE INCONSISTENCY."
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socialization, relationships, boundaries, communication

"you're not actually a better friend for not articulating and respecting your own needs, limits and boundaries. your lack of communication and boundaries is not some impressive sacrifice. you're not doing anyone any favors by acting like you're okay with things you arent okay with. you're just building burnout and resentment that will eventually damage the relationship in question. and when you eventually snap and walk away because you silently overburdened yourself to be a "good friend", it wont be the other persons fault

highkey, this is how i lost my friends in high school. im being so serious. i know y'all are people pleaser, y'all have precious trauma or whatever to be that way, but im so serious when im telling y'all its time for that character development"
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digital, rest, art

"a friend said to me last year, "you can use your time to either make art or argue with a 15 year old edgelord on social media, your choice." and you know what, she is right"
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anxiety, depression, digital, political

"when i was a boy and i would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, "look for the helpers. you will always find people who are helping." to this day, especially in times of "disaster", i remember my mother's words and i am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers - so many caring people in this world"
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male loneliness crisis, society

"before you make that post about "the crisis facing men and boys" or "preventing redpill radicalization" stop and check in:
if your proposed solution

1.increased labor of women and girls
2.women and girls enduring more abuse for the benefit of men and boys
3.women and girls suppressing their emotions (fear, anger, resentment, etc,) and limiting their speech
4.blaming populations of women (e.g. trans women, women involved in sex trades, racialized women) for the actions of men and expecting those women to endure punishment for men
5.focusing on mantaining manhood and masculinity while reducing the discomfort men feel about holding this position, framing men's feelings of insecurity as the central issue to be addressed when it comes to violent misogyny

if so:
your "solution" to behavioral patterns emerging withing patriarchy is more patriarchy
instead:
try to imagine literally anything else"
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invisible problems, disabilities, mental health

"there is no award for never asking for help"
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drugs, digital, rest

"learning that addiction is a progressive narrowing of the range of things that make one happy was kinda life changing for me. i apply it to everything not even just addiction i am always checking to ask if i am narrowing my range of happiness or widening it

always good to check whether your coping stragety has become something that needs its own coping strategies"
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art, rest

"3 easy ways to start drawing again

1- doodle
when i was a cashier i would fill up post-it notes with squiggles. like this [example] and then fill in the "background" with pencil or sharpie
here are some of my go-to doodles. everyone has their own. get the hand moving!

2-copy
drawings, movie stills, paintings, manga panels. anything you like. dont worry about it looking perfect
each imperfection and wobbly line gives the copy life. it becomes a new image

i like to color them in with no regard for the original. i also recommend doing all this while watching/listening to the junk media of your choice. ("ben quadrineros clearly was named after his podracer instead of the other way around. ben is")

3- draw together
a grade school classic. pass a notebook back and forth with a good friend. there's no pressure to make pretty pictures - i just want to make the other person laugh
(waiting patiently)
you can do this
--on an airplane!
--waiting for food at a restaurant!
--at the dmv!"

{art by junkworld}
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anxiety, stress, impostor syndrome

"i had a professor in college who used to start solving every problem with the same dialogue

proff: what's the first step to solving any problem?
class: dont panic
proff: and why is that?
class: because we know more than we think we do

i think about that a lot tbh. it didnt occur to me until much later that he meant for us to apply that dialogue outside of the classroom to any problem. because we always know more than we think we do. we are all an amalgam of random information that ends up being relevant with surprising frequency"
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rest, self compassion, guilt, art

"reframing motivation not as an act of will, but a thing that naturally occurs when i am rested, fed, and am taking things at my own slow pace has helped me a lot"
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socialization, boundaries

"dont blame a clown for acting like a clown. ask yourself why you keep going to the circus."
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anxiety, socialization, venn diagram

'impostor syndrome vs reality:
what i know, what i think others know, what others actually know'
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jobs, society

"people today are spoiled to shit [...]

you're not mad someone else might make $15/hr, you're mad you're not making $35/hr. and you should be. your enemy isn't the poor bastard finally getting a few more crumbs, it's the billionaire who's been robbing you of a living wage for the past forever, and will keep doing so"
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socialization, affection, society

"some of y'all think that holding hands and sharing a bed is immediately romantic, and this is why people cannot differentiate between romantic, platonic, and familial forms of love

nothing is EVER inherently romantic. the meaning of a gesture is determined by the people involved in it, not some random outsider

the meaning of a gesture is determined by the people involved in it"
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society, digital

"like, do you guys know that the attention economy thrives on hate? do you understand the most powerful thing you could do to something is to ignore it and not acknowledge it? do you not understand how anything works ever?"
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