You ever tried to drink to heal the pain but you ended up drunk and hurt?

@deepthoughts2

I really like u but my girl friend doesn't

@deepthoughts2

Eyelashes are supposed to prevent things from getting into ur eyes b/t when I do have something in my eye it's usually an eyelash. Eyeronic!!

@deepthoughts2

An onion forces you to cry over it's dead body.

@deepthoughts2

Do twins ever realise that one of them was unplanned.

@deepthoughts2

You can't have a beautiful ending with out making beautiful mistakes

@Deepthoughts2

Our tone changes to male when we describe something big and to female when we describe something small...

Nevermind

@deepthoughts2

There is nothing like putting on a new pair of socks

@deepthoughts2

Me: googles* show me the formula of sodium hydride

Google: NaH

Me: alright keep ur secrets

@deepthoughts2

Had a long day? Why don't u do urself a favor and go ask ur mom to pronounce google for you.

@deepthoughts2

"You dont talk much do u?"

Me:*tries to talk*
- gets interrupted
- no one cares
- gets talked over
- gets ignored

@deepthoughts2

*bath time

3years old: *pointing at his balls*, is this my brain?

Me: Not yet, buddy, not yet

@deepthoughts2

My girlfriend is like a ቡፌ



She take a big place in me ,but I never know the use of her.

@deepthoughts2

I judge people with their profile pic.

@deepthoughts2

Don't follow anybody's footsteps create your own.

@deepthoughts2

My heart cold but it really beat for you, though.

@deepthoughts2

ማን ነው ስምሽ?

8yr old girl: የቤት ነው የት/ቤት?

Me:

The girl:

Me: እናትሽ እድር ተጠርተዋል ንገርያቸው

@deepthoughts2

No one will ever know what it really smells like under water.

@deepthoughts2

A little girl from China covered a cat on the street with leaves b/c she was afraid it would catch a cold.
Friend: awww 😍😍😇
Me: Nah she's just adding a side of salad to her meal.

@deepthoughts2

2nd place means you're the best loser.

@deepthoughts2

Every stairway is a stairway to heaven if you're clumsy enough

@deepthoughts2