Chicken or Egg, which one comes first?

If you believe in God, obviously God created chickens first

If you believe in Evolution, still chickens are first to evolve

End of the argument!

*When visiting someone sick

Americans: Get well soon

British: Wishing you speedy recovery

Ethiopian: I know someone who died with that same illness

The way some of you jump to conclusions will qualify you to the Olympic pole-vault game

Does your boyfriend know you’re single?

text: i can’t

email: i cannot

መመረቅያ ጽሁፍ : i am unable to can

Do not keep all your work for tomorrow, always remember you can also do it the day after tomorrow.. Be lazy, Think crazy

@deepthoughts2

I hope life gives you wings, and you have the courage to use them.

@deepthoughts2

If you say the word "robe" over and over again, it turns into the word "bro".

@deepthoughts2

Teacher: I want drop silence in the class
No one:

Backbenchers: Meow 🧐😂

@deepthoughts2

Things I do when I need to study
❎Study
✅Tell everyone I have to study
😐

@deepthoughts2

If you’re over 25, it’s illegal to say you’re “super-excited” about anything

@deepthoughts2

A guy walks into a bar and orders a punch

The bartender says “Sir, if you wanna punch, you gotta get in line.”
The guy looks around but there is no punch line

@deepthoughts2

Repeat with me

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? He would chuck, he would, as much as he could, and chuck as much as a woodchuck would if a woodchuck could chuck wood

@deepthoughts2

People are embarrassed about buying condoms in public, yet getting laid is seen as badge of honor.

@deepthoughts2

A lie is just a great story that someone ruined with the truth.
Barney Stinson

@deepthoughts2

People don't make sex noises at the gym, they make gym noises during sex.

@deepthoughts2

Not all goodbyes are sad

Eg: Goodbye ,class 👐

@deepthoughts2

When you start seeing your worth, you'll stop seeing people who don't.

@deepthoughts2

Never do a wrong thing to make a friend or to keep one

@deepthoughts2

What unit of measurement do you use to weigh bones?

Skele tons!
Stay spooky my dudes

@deepthoughts2