Me, after tumbling down stairs: ooh, that's a lot faster.

hey guys

i was trying to put on my sweater and it got hung up on my head and my arms were sticking out weirdly and my mouth was also visible and i felt like i looked like some weird monster or cryptid so naturally i walked around like that while making weird cryptid…

When you have paranoia you should just remind yourself nobody cares about you since you're a worthless piece of inedible meat.

and btw, i wont go to jail, at least i dont think. its just, the car that'll get taken away? it's my roomates, he got it a few yrs ago for $20k and i had to pay the bills on it which obviously i couldn't do