💎 [An essential cause of unity is disregarding & ignoring provocation and instigation]

Al-Hasan al Basri (رحمه الله) said,

ما استقصى كريم قط.

"A noble person never insists on exacting his full rights."

Amr ibn Uthman al-Makki ( رحمه الله) said,

"المروءة التغافل عن زلل الإخوان".

"True nobility is overlooking the faults of friends."

Al-Awza'i ( رحمه الله) said,

السلامة عشرة أجزاء؛ منها: تسعـة في التغافل.

"Well-being consists of ten parts; nine of them are in overlooking faults."

This is similarly reported from Imam Uthman ibn Zaidah, eliciting Imam Ahmad to respond,

العافية عشرة أجزاء كلها في التغافل

"Well-being consists of ten parts, all of them in overlooking faults."

Sufyan al-Thawri ( رحمه الله) said,

ما زال التغافل من فعل الكرام.

"Overlooking faults has always been the practice of the noble."

Al-A’mash ( رحمه الله) said,

: "التغافل يطفئ شرًا كثيرًا"

"Overlooking faults extinguishes much evil."

Al-Shafi’i ( رحمه الله) said,

"الكيّس العاقل هو الفطن المتغافل"

"The intelligent and wise person is the one who pretends not to notice."

The poet said:

ليس الغبي بسيد في قومه *** لكن سيد قومه المتغابي

"The fool is not the leader of his people, but the leader of his people is the one who pretends to be a fool."

Aktham ibn Saifi ( رحمه الله) said:

مَنْ شَدَّدَ نَفَّرَ، وَمَنْ تَرَاخَى تَأَلَّفَ، وَالشَّرَفُ فِي التَّغَافُلِ،

"Whoever is strict repels others, and whoever is lenient wins their affection. Nobility lies in overlooking faults."

He also said,

السَّخَاءُ حُسْنُ الْفَطِنَةِ وَاللُّؤْمُ سُـوءُ التَّغَافُـلِ.

"Generosity is good perception, and meanness is poor perception of what should be overlooked."

Salahuddin al-Ṣafadī said in his Lāmiyah poem:

واستشعرِ الحِلمَ في كلِّ الأمورِ ولا * * * تُسرع ببادرةٍ يوماً إلى رجلِ

Embrace wise-restraint in all matters,
And never hastily lash out at anyone.

وإنْ بُليتَ بشخصٍ لاَ خَلاقَ لهُ * * * فكُنْ كأنَّكَ لمْ تسمعْ ولمْ يَقُلِ

If you are afflicted with a person who lacks goodness,
Act as if you did not hear him and he did not speak.


Ibn al-Azraq said about kingly manners in "Bada'i' al-Silk fi Taba'i' al-Mulk":

إِن من السخاء وَالْكَرم ترك التجني وَترك الْبَحْث عَن بَاطِن الغيوب والإمساك عَن ذكر الْعُيُوب كَمَا أَن من تَمام الْفَضَائِل الصفح عَن التوبيخ وإكرام الْكَرِيم والبشر فِي اللِّقَاء ورد التَّحِيَّة والتغافل عَن خطأ الْجَاهِل، من شدد نفر وَمن ترَاخى تألف

"Generosity and nobility include refraining from seeking revenge, abstaining from probing into hidden matters, refraining from mentioning faults, and part of perfect virtues is forgiving reproach, honoring the noble, showing a cheerful countenance, reciprocating greetings, and overlooking the mistakes of the ignorant. Strictness repels people, and leniency wins their affection."

💎[The Divine Wisdom of Being Broken in Order to Be Fixed & Improved]

Ibn al Qayyim (d. 751 AH رحمه الله) said (Mukhtaṣar al-Ṣawā’iq p. 306):

"وَاللَّهُ تَعَالَى لَمَّا أَرَادَ كَرَامَتَهُ كَمَّلَ لَهُ مَرْتَبَةَ الْمِحْنَةِ وَالْبَلْوَى لِيَصْبِرَ فَيَنَالَ الدَّرَجَةَ الَّتِي لَا يَصِلُ إِلَيْهَا إِلَّا عَلَى حَسَبِ الِابْتِلَاءِ، وَلَوْ لَمْ يَكُنْ فِي ذَلِكَ إِلَّا تَكْمِيلُ فَرَحِهِ وَسُرُورِهِ بِاجْتِمَاعِ شَمْلِهِ بِحَبِيبِهِ بَعْدَ الْفِرَاقِ،

"When Allah, the Exalted, intended to bestow His honor upon him (i.e., Ya’qūb عليه السلام) , He perfected for him the stage of trial and tribulation so that he would be patient and attain the level that can only be reached through trials. Even if the only outcome of that was the completion of his joy and happiness in reuniting with his beloved after separation [this alone would enough].

وَهَذَا مِنْ كَمَالِ إِحْسَانِ الرَّبِّ تَعَالَى أَنْ يُذِيقَ عَبْدَهُ مَرَارَةَ الْكَسْرِ قَبْلَ حَلَاوَةِ الْجَبْرِ، وَيُعَرِّفَهُ قَدْرَ نِعْمَتِهِ عَلَيْهِ بِأَنْ يَبْتَلِيَهُ بِضِدِّهَا،

This is from the perfection of the Lord's benevolence: He, the Exalted, lets His servant taste the bitterness of brokenness before the sweetness of restoration, and makes him appreciate His blessing upon him by testing him with its opposite.

كَمَا أَنَّ سبحانه وتعالى لَمَّا أَرَادَ أَنْ يُكَمِّلَ لِآدَمَ نَعِيمَ الْجَنَّةِ ‌أَذَاقَهُ ‌مَرَارَةَ خُرُوجِهِ مِنْهَا، وَمُقَاسَاةَ هَذِهِ الدَّارِ الْمَمْزُوجِ رَخَاؤُهَا بِشِدَّتِهَا،

Just as when Allah, Glorified and Exalted be He, wanted to perfect Adam's bliss in Paradise, He let him taste the bitterness of being expelled from it and the hardship of enduring this world, where ease is mixed with difficulty.

فَمَا كَسَرَ عَبْدَهُ الْمُؤْمِنَ إِلَّا لِيَجْبُرَهُ، وَلَا مَنَعَهُ إِلَّا لِيُعْطِيَهُ، وَلَا ابْتَلَاهُ إِلَّا لِيُعَافِيَهُ، وَلَا أَمَاتَهُ إِلَّا لِيُحْيِيَهُ، وَلَا نَغَّصَ عَلَيْهِ الدُّنْيَا إِلَّا لِيُرَغِّبَهُ فِي الْآخِرَةِ، وَلَا ابْتَلَاهُ بِجَفَاءِ النَّاسِ إِلَّا لِيَرُدَّهُ إِلَيْهِ".

Thus, He did not break His believing servant except to restore him, nor did He withhold from him except to give him, nor did He test him except to heal him, nor did He cause him to die except to bring him to life, nor did He make this world bitter for him except to make him long for the Hereafter, nor did He test him with people's harshness except to draw him back to Him."