[trannoscription]
[1/5]
Therapists are just.... Common sense filters
Me: yeah so i just don't have the energy to get up and make myself a sandwich or wait for something to cook so i just. Don't
Her: why don't you just eat the sandwich components without putting them together
Me:
Her: you can just eat a handful of cheese and some sandwich meat. You don't have to make a sandwich.
Me:
Me: what
[2/5]
Therapists finding loopholes for mental illness things is one of my favorite things about dealing with mental iliness because it really helps me understand that just because a reaction is Common doesn't mean it's Right. Does doing dishes stress you out a lot? Buy paper plates. Do your obsessive thoughts make you worry about leaving your curling iron on so you drive home from work to check? Just put the curling iron in your purse and bring it to work with you while we work on tackling where this worry comes from. Symptom management doesn't have to look like drudgery.
[3/5]
i used to go days without showering because seeing my body was so upsetting that i would end up spiraling and then i realized i could simply turn the lights out. it took some getting used to but i've been showering with the lights off for years and it's now one of my favorite parts of my day. do whatever you want nothing is real and there's no need to inflict unnecessary suffering on yourself just to try to seem “normal”
[4/5]
These kinds of loopholes make life so. Much. Better.
One of my favorite stories is this lady had extremely bad OCD. Every day she'd be late to work because she was convinced that her hair dryer was going to burn down the house so would always have to turn around and check it. Multiple times a day even. A bunch of doctors tied to “fix" her of that fear, until one day she got a doctor that suggested she bring the hair dryer with her. Other doctors were annoyed, saying that wasn't a the correct way to help, but she gave it a go. When she had that fear, she'd look over and see the hair dryer unplugged in the seat next to her and was able to carry on. i think it's such a perfect example of actually helping someone instead of forcing them into a neurotypical standard.
[5/5]
That story helped me stop repeatedly checking if my front door was locked. Instead of checking that the door was locked over and over i would check my security system app. If it's on it will alert me if the front door opens. "...actually helping someone instead of forcing them into a neurotypical standard" should be added to the Hippocratic Oath. "

unlearning, self compassion

"how are you feeling?

does it matter? i'll manage.

how you feel is very important. i'm sorry if the world has taught you otherwise"

{art by swatercolour}

abuse, family, socialization

"
"Don't say you hate your fam-" No.
"Omg you should love your fami-" No.
"Be grateful they're your famil-" No.

If you have been bullied, hit, teased, put down, hurt, lied to, or hated by your own family; you don't need to justify how you feel. You don't need to explain yourself. You are allowed to hate a family member or dislike a family member if they've given you a reason to.

This is so fucking important. It's true. Family is basically a microcosm of government, complete with hierarchy and those who would abuse it. Just because they're blood relatives doesn't mean you'll unmistakably get along with them. "

abuse, relationships

"you deserve connections that don't require you to walk on eggshells to get a point across. you deserve connections that don't require you to sacrifice your peace just to protect feelings or egos. you deserve connections that don't require you to distance your self, from yourself. "

invisible problems, self compassion, neurodivergency, society

"hard to swallow pills

you're not "lazy". your mental illness forces you to spend an enormous amount of energy just to keep yourself together. you work hard every day. even if the fruits of your labor aren't immediately obvious to everyone."

communication, good intentions

"one doesn't have to operate with great malice to do great harm

the absence of empathy & understanding are sufficient"

abuse, trauma, socialization, trauma reactions

"Emotional abuse works like this: You are screamed at, and then, not knowing any better, you stand up for yourself. You think this is a way of being strong. You think this is a defense tactic.But this only provokes more screaming. Going silent provokes more screaming too, but usually it keeps the threats to the minimum. It keeps it just at screaming and not: a shove down the stairs, or order to pack your stuff and get out. So you learn how to go silent. How to play dead. How to cry without making a noise. How to swallow noise. How to wipe your cheeks, get out of the car, and go about your day. You learn. And when the screaming has stopped, when the two of you are in the car or out to dinner and they’re all smiles, all asking for favors, all questions, you are still hurt and annoyed and want to ask them, how? How can you speak to me like that? How can you pretend you did not say those things? How can you have forgotten? But you’ve learned. So you listen to, "Can i borrow your key"s and "how was your day"s and you play dead. You swallow the noise. And sometimes it doesn’t matter who is speaking to you, it doesn’t matter if they’re a friend, it doesn’t matter if their criticism is constructive, it doesn’t matter. You’ve learned. Any sort of speaking, any raising of the voice, any insult and you play dead."

boundaries, relationships, socialization

"Healthy Relationships

Accountability
·Admits mistakes (or when wrong)
·Accepts responsibility for behaviors, attitudes, & values

Trust
·Accepting each others word
·Giving the benefit of the doubt

Cooperation
·Asking not expecting
·Accepting change
·Making decisions together
·Willing to compromise
·Win win resolutions to conflict


Support
·Support each others choices
·Being understanding
·Offering encouragement
·Listening non-judgmentally
·Valuing opinions

Honesty
·Communicates openly and truthfully

Safety
·Refusing to intimidate or manipulate
·Respecting physical space
·Expressing self non-violently
"

trauma, growth, healing

"What we think healing will look like:
Meditating Peacefully

What healing actually looks like:
Unpacking Trauma

Having Difficult Conversations

Taking Radical Responsibility For Your Actions

Setting & Enforcing Boundaries

Implementing Healthy Routines"

socialization, boundaries

"peace of mind is much more important than proving a point"

#art_credit_missing

socialization, boundaries

"my parents told me "the problem with putting others first is you've taught them you come last" and that hit me hard"

unscheduled post:

forwarding a message to give it visibility
"[...] fill the form, there's only one page and a couple questions, so go for it - no big bureaucracy involved"

edit for extra explanation: "conversion therapies" refers to the extremely abusive places, often camps, that promise to turn gay kids heterosexual, trans youth into cis "normal, decent people" and sometimes other things like "curing autism"

Ban conversion therapies in Europe:
https://eci.ec.europa.eu/043/public/#/screen/home

growth, healing

"changing every "i should have known better" to "i know better now". i will not judge past versions of me through the lens of who i am now."

"My therapist told me yesterday: some people (esp family) will choose to remember & recognize only the version of you that they held the most power over, no matter how long it's been or how much you've changed.

And i cannot stop thinking about it."

growth, socialization, abusers

"you've changed

we're supposed to"

#art_credit_missing
#help_wanted