What do you think about jokes about adult virgins?
It's pretty common for people to stereotype adult virgins as losers or pathetic or what have you.Or like in the movie The 40-Year Old Virgin. I'm a 37 year old virgin male, and those jokes never particularly bothered me. I never thought that they were making fun of me personally, because I always felt like I could have sex if I wanted to, but I never cared enough to bother with it.
https://redd.it/1pxyuhf
@asexualityonreddit
It's pretty common for people to stereotype adult virgins as losers or pathetic or what have you.Or like in the movie The 40-Year Old Virgin. I'm a 37 year old virgin male, and those jokes never particularly bothered me. I never thought that they were making fun of me personally, because I always felt like I could have sex if I wanted to, but I never cared enough to bother with it.
https://redd.it/1pxyuhf
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
From the Asexual community on Reddit
Explore this post and more from the Asexual community
Hey, is there a kind of intimacy that you don’t think it’s sexual but most people do? If so, which one is it?
https://redd.it/1pxyi6g
@asexualityonreddit
https://redd.it/1pxyi6g
@asexualityonreddit
Which type of attraction overwhelms you whenever you experience it? Which type of attraction is most likely to ground you in reality?
Attractions:
Romance
Platonic
Aesthetic
Sensual
Intellectual
Alterous
Sexual
etc etc.
https://redd.it/1pxzvz5
@asexualityonreddit
Attractions:
Romance
Platonic
Aesthetic
Sensual
Intellectual
Alterous
Sexual
etc etc.
https://redd.it/1pxzvz5
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
From the Asexual community on Reddit
Explore this post and more from the Asexual community
I hate tampons
My parents decided that we are going to the beach to new year, which I wouldn't mind if I was allowed to stay in the sand. I don’t like the sea, but I NEED to go to the sea because it’s the only place someone so old (as in older than 10) can play and if I don’t go I ruin all the fun and they will keep complaining non-stop. But when I thought I had find a loophole to not be dragged to the water, they are now bottering about tampons and how I NEED to use them so I can have "real" fun in the beach (Did I mention I don’t like the sea?) and I can’t show any kind of discomfort about them bothering me because according to them, the other one said I loved swimming and since my sister uses tampons, I need to give them a try because I will like them like my sister.
I don’t know if it’s a sex-averse thing (probably is) but I hate the sensation of being penetrated by anything, and just the idea of having something inside of me for hours nonstop just to I can take a salty bath so my drunken parents don’t get their fellings hurt makes me feel gross. Then my mom bought the tampons, my sister saw then and her first reaction was "MOM, THOSE ARE WAY TO BIG!" I hate my own fingertips, she is the one that is used to it, I had never used it in my life, my mom haven’t seen my vagina since I got potty trained and I can’t even not want to use the tampons that are "way to big".
https://redd.it/1pxwuxr
@asexualityonreddit
My parents decided that we are going to the beach to new year, which I wouldn't mind if I was allowed to stay in the sand. I don’t like the sea, but I NEED to go to the sea because it’s the only place someone so old (as in older than 10) can play and if I don’t go I ruin all the fun and they will keep complaining non-stop. But when I thought I had find a loophole to not be dragged to the water, they are now bottering about tampons and how I NEED to use them so I can have "real" fun in the beach (Did I mention I don’t like the sea?) and I can’t show any kind of discomfort about them bothering me because according to them, the other one said I loved swimming and since my sister uses tampons, I need to give them a try because I will like them like my sister.
I don’t know if it’s a sex-averse thing (probably is) but I hate the sensation of being penetrated by anything, and just the idea of having something inside of me for hours nonstop just to I can take a salty bath so my drunken parents don’t get their fellings hurt makes me feel gross. Then my mom bought the tampons, my sister saw then and her first reaction was "MOM, THOSE ARE WAY TO BIG!" I hate my own fingertips, she is the one that is used to it, I had never used it in my life, my mom haven’t seen my vagina since I got potty trained and I can’t even not want to use the tampons that are "way to big".
https://redd.it/1pxwuxr
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
From the asexuality community on Reddit
Explore this post and more from the asexuality community
Being an ace man :/
From what I've seen (mostly in person, less so online) it seems like if a woman has limited sexual experience, or isn't particularly sexual, it's seen as desirable and "pure" - some assholes think that this makes them prudish or whatever, and while I'm sure women get harassed for it a lot more than I can see, I only know my own experience
Being a man on the other hand (allegedly a pretty good looking one, too) I feel like there's a lot of societal pressure to be some sort of sex god. From a societal sense of worth to inappropriate questions about what I have/haven't done with various women, it really does feel like there's something wrong with me.
It all just seems very emasculating, and like I'm less than. Again, it beats being harassed, but it isn't great.
I know that everyone here will say that there's nothing wrong with being ace, and I agree with that on an ideological basis, but that doesn't mean society as a whole agrees
Anyway, I guess I was just feeling sad :(
https://redd.it/1py4pku
@asexualityonreddit
From what I've seen (mostly in person, less so online) it seems like if a woman has limited sexual experience, or isn't particularly sexual, it's seen as desirable and "pure" - some assholes think that this makes them prudish or whatever, and while I'm sure women get harassed for it a lot more than I can see, I only know my own experience
Being a man on the other hand (allegedly a pretty good looking one, too) I feel like there's a lot of societal pressure to be some sort of sex god. From a societal sense of worth to inappropriate questions about what I have/haven't done with various women, it really does feel like there's something wrong with me.
It all just seems very emasculating, and like I'm less than. Again, it beats being harassed, but it isn't great.
I know that everyone here will say that there's nothing wrong with being ace, and I agree with that on an ideological basis, but that doesn't mean society as a whole agrees
Anyway, I guess I was just feeling sad :(
https://redd.it/1py4pku
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
From the asexuality community on Reddit
Explore this post and more from the asexuality community
Being asexual vs defensive vs repressed vs sexual dysfunction?
Genuine question mainly for folks who went through a questioning phase. Especially folks with trauma and/or grew up in sex-negative / body-negative environments.
How did you know you were asexual as opposed to avoiding intimacy, or just learned to repress yo ur sexuality and view sex as a bad thing due to bad experiences? How did you know you genuinely weren’t interested in sex?
And what’s the difference between being asexual vs having a sexual arousal disorder or a low libido as a symptom of a health concern? Is it simply that you aren’t distressed by your lack of desire / arousal response? Or is it something else?
Thanks y’all!
And apologies if any language I used was insensitive.
https://redd.it/1py9sj5
@asexualityonreddit
Genuine question mainly for folks who went through a questioning phase. Especially folks with trauma and/or grew up in sex-negative / body-negative environments.
How did you know you were asexual as opposed to avoiding intimacy, or just learned to repress yo ur sexuality and view sex as a bad thing due to bad experiences? How did you know you genuinely weren’t interested in sex?
And what’s the difference between being asexual vs having a sexual arousal disorder or a low libido as a symptom of a health concern? Is it simply that you aren’t distressed by your lack of desire / arousal response? Or is it something else?
Thanks y’all!
And apologies if any language I used was insensitive.
https://redd.it/1py9sj5
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
From the Asexual community on Reddit
Explore this post and more from the Asexual community
Am I Asexual?
If you are questioning whether or not you are asexual (including all microlabels), reply to this post with what made you start questioning, and why.
If you are too shy to post a reply, then you can scroll through the responses for the advice you may be searching for.
https://redd.it/1pyd8eg
@asexualityonreddit
If you are questioning whether or not you are asexual (including all microlabels), reply to this post with what made you start questioning, and why.
If you are too shy to post a reply, then you can scroll through the responses for the advice you may be searching for.
https://redd.it/1pyd8eg
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
From the Asexual community on Reddit
Explore this post and more from the Asexual community
Y’all ever wish you weren’t ace sometimes?
I’m 23M and I’m closeted and most likely will be forever. I don’t plan on telling anyone except my future partner, who will hopefully also be ace and what not.
But man, I can’t relate with my homies or guys around me sometimes. Today, genuinely, we went out for a mini group reunion and everyone got a bit plastered lol. And then the boys who were single talked about what their “type” was and things they’re “into”. So for context I’m sex averse and I truly don’t have any thoughts like that in terms of a partner. I know it sounds cheesy and corny, but I’m not a “looks” or an “acts” orientated guy, I go off vibes. My turn came and I made some stuff up and fronted lol.
I tell everyone I’m waiting till marriage cuz I’m religious(only a half lie cuz I’m kinda religious but obviously that’s not why I’m waiting till marriage), so they think that’s what’s hindering me from relationships lol. But it’s a convenient white lie that stops prodding questions.
Anyway, that entire talk, I felt like I was acting a character. Thankfully my “main group” of friends and my inner circles, we don’t really have convos like that. But like outer circles and people like the old buddies I hung out with today it’s like that.
But this isn’t even my first time, I’ve been in multiple locker room talks and some of my good homies are frat boy types too and they’re like brothers to me and I’ve hung out with them most of my undergrad life when I was there. So like I’ve been putting up a “front” for a while.
And to add to that, despite being from America and being around queerness and it being normalized to me, my folks are from India and are more like a “not in my backyard” type, so I don’t even think I would ever tell my folks.
Sometimes I find myself thinking I was I was “normal” and not having to play a character lol. I play a character for friends and family alike, and it gets exhausting, so sometimes I wish I was just that character instead you know? But I quickly get out of it somehow lol.
Anyway yeah just wanted to vent. Might be a bit buzzed still lol. Anyone else relate?
https://redd.it/1pydzvq
@asexualityonreddit
I’m 23M and I’m closeted and most likely will be forever. I don’t plan on telling anyone except my future partner, who will hopefully also be ace and what not.
But man, I can’t relate with my homies or guys around me sometimes. Today, genuinely, we went out for a mini group reunion and everyone got a bit plastered lol. And then the boys who were single talked about what their “type” was and things they’re “into”. So for context I’m sex averse and I truly don’t have any thoughts like that in terms of a partner. I know it sounds cheesy and corny, but I’m not a “looks” or an “acts” orientated guy, I go off vibes. My turn came and I made some stuff up and fronted lol.
I tell everyone I’m waiting till marriage cuz I’m religious(only a half lie cuz I’m kinda religious but obviously that’s not why I’m waiting till marriage), so they think that’s what’s hindering me from relationships lol. But it’s a convenient white lie that stops prodding questions.
Anyway, that entire talk, I felt like I was acting a character. Thankfully my “main group” of friends and my inner circles, we don’t really have convos like that. But like outer circles and people like the old buddies I hung out with today it’s like that.
But this isn’t even my first time, I’ve been in multiple locker room talks and some of my good homies are frat boy types too and they’re like brothers to me and I’ve hung out with them most of my undergrad life when I was there. So like I’ve been putting up a “front” for a while.
And to add to that, despite being from America and being around queerness and it being normalized to me, my folks are from India and are more like a “not in my backyard” type, so I don’t even think I would ever tell my folks.
Sometimes I find myself thinking I was I was “normal” and not having to play a character lol. I play a character for friends and family alike, and it gets exhausting, so sometimes I wish I was just that character instead you know? But I quickly get out of it somehow lol.
Anyway yeah just wanted to vent. Might be a bit buzzed still lol. Anyone else relate?
https://redd.it/1pydzvq
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
From the Asexual community on Reddit
Explore this post and more from the Asexual community
How do non ace feel about sex? Why is sex so important?
I just want to understand. Because my ex husband cheated on me and blamed me for not having sex with him (I know well this is his problem, not mine even I’m ace), and someone I’m seeing right now said sex is important to them to feel intimacy in relationship.
How do non ace people feel about sex? How does sex really make them feel about relationship they are in? How does it bring intimacy?
To me, sex is just an activity that I don’t enjoy. It’s like fishing, it’s like hunting, some people might enjoy as their hobby, but I’m just not interested in it. Do you get it? I’m wondering if other ace can get it because people around me cannot!!
Why can’t we have genuine connection without sex? What’s so great about it? The pleasure? I don’t know if I feel this way because I’ve only been with men, because my lesbian friends told me they hated sex before having sex with women. Now they say they enjoy it. So idk, but just the idea of doing it exhausts me even it’s with a woman. I want to do and enjoy other activities other than sex.
I don’t understand how sex brings intimacy. I want to understand and want to feel that way. But I can’t. It’s just a boring activity to me. Like.. listening to country music? (Nothing wrong with country music.) it’s just not my type! It brings almost no pleasure. Doing it by myself with vibrator brings more pleasure. Sex doesn’t make me feel loved or any closer to the other person. I feel so empty when all other people don’t get me. I feel sad these days.
https://redd.it/1pyiqrb
@asexualityonreddit
I just want to understand. Because my ex husband cheated on me and blamed me for not having sex with him (I know well this is his problem, not mine even I’m ace), and someone I’m seeing right now said sex is important to them to feel intimacy in relationship.
How do non ace people feel about sex? How does sex really make them feel about relationship they are in? How does it bring intimacy?
To me, sex is just an activity that I don’t enjoy. It’s like fishing, it’s like hunting, some people might enjoy as their hobby, but I’m just not interested in it. Do you get it? I’m wondering if other ace can get it because people around me cannot!!
Why can’t we have genuine connection without sex? What’s so great about it? The pleasure? I don’t know if I feel this way because I’ve only been with men, because my lesbian friends told me they hated sex before having sex with women. Now they say they enjoy it. So idk, but just the idea of doing it exhausts me even it’s with a woman. I want to do and enjoy other activities other than sex.
I don’t understand how sex brings intimacy. I want to understand and want to feel that way. But I can’t. It’s just a boring activity to me. Like.. listening to country music? (Nothing wrong with country music.) it’s just not my type! It brings almost no pleasure. Doing it by myself with vibrator brings more pleasure. Sex doesn’t make me feel loved or any closer to the other person. I feel so empty when all other people don’t get me. I feel sad these days.
https://redd.it/1pyiqrb
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
From the asexuality community on Reddit
Explore this post and more from the asexuality community
How do I make my dad understand that I'm ASEXUAL?
Hi! I, (16F), have been dating my boyfriend (17M) for over half a year. We both are asexual and the most we have done is cuddling and kissing. We do not plan on anything sexual.
I told my dad about my sexual orientation (biromantic) when I was 13, and he understands the "liking girls and boys" but he doesn't get the "not wanting sexual relationships"
I thought he would slowly catch up, but he keeps making sexual jokes and not letting me spend the evening with my bf.
How do I explain it to him? 😭 I'm getting desperate
https://redd.it/1pykwzx
@asexualityonreddit
Hi! I, (16F), have been dating my boyfriend (17M) for over half a year. We both are asexual and the most we have done is cuddling and kissing. We do not plan on anything sexual.
I told my dad about my sexual orientation (biromantic) when I was 13, and he understands the "liking girls and boys" but he doesn't get the "not wanting sexual relationships"
I thought he would slowly catch up, but he keeps making sexual jokes and not letting me spend the evening with my bf.
How do I explain it to him? 😭 I'm getting desperate
https://redd.it/1pykwzx
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
From the Asexual community on Reddit
Explore this post and more from the Asexual community