GM, what's the highlight of your week?

CREATE ORDER OUT OF CHAOS

As a human, one of your core functions and “raison d’être” is to create Order out of Chaos. We’ve been doing this for tens of thousands of years at a large scale. But this is particularly important at the individual level.

Truth is, without this in mind, you will keep navigating life blindly, do activities you don’t enjoy, keep living a life you hate.

That’s not how it’s supposed to be.

You’re not supposed to snooze your alarm in the morning and hate yourself while you wash your face to start doing tasks that don’t fulfill you.

This is the reality for most people on this Earth.

They hate their lives, and they have no idea where they’re going with this shit.

When you fail to create order at a personal level, you become a mess and that’s no way to live.

Now, the question that begs for an answer here is:

How do you create order from chaos?

Or even what does it mean to do so?

Well for starters, let’s do a small definition.

Let’s consider chaos as the uncertainty and doubt while order represents clarity and intention.

You might feel like your life is ordered and you have it figured out.

But the right question to ask is whether or not you CHOSE that order or if it was IMPOSED on you.

To cut things down to the actionable part:

What do you want from life?

How do you get there?

What’s the next step?

When we talk about order being clarity and intention, it means that you wake up every day with a clear vision in mind to build and a specific task list that will help you make this day one more building block in the future you’re building.

When every day is a step of your plan, life starts to take all its meaning.

When all you do is wake up and survive, you get depressed, hate yourself and embrace the chaos.

Your lifetime is not supposed to build someone else’s vision.

Are you WORTHY ENOUGH OF BUILDING YOUR OWN VISION?

Or do you not value yourself to the point where you accept being a tool in the elite’s vision of the world.

What can you do every day to break free of this.

All of this might sound like nothing but rambling and ranting, or even abstract concepts.

But the thing is that you need to ask yourself the right questions if you want to get to the right answers. All the right questions are mentioned above if you know how to read between the lines.

And if you can’t, then simply ask yourself:

What do I want and what am I doing to get it?

The answer must not be vague.

You don’t just want to “get rich” or “make it”.

You want to define specific and measurable goals so you can reverse engineer a plan to reach them.

Getting rich, everyone wants that.

How about: I want to make 10 million dollars within the next 5 years.

What are steps I can follow and milestones I should reach in order to get to those goals.

As you start breaking it all down from the end result to the daily recurring tasks to do every day, you start having a stronger vision and determination.

And you know what you start feeling then?

That bitch ass motivation you’ve been seeking for so long.

Because now it has reason to exist.

Motivation does not exist in chaos.

Motivation needs clarity. It needs order.

The nature of psychological compulsion is such that those who act under constraint remain under the impression that they are acting on their own initiative. The victim of mind-manipulation does not know that he is a victim. To him the walls of his prison are invisible, and he believes himself to be free. That he is not free is apparent only to other people. His servitude is strictly objective.

Aldous Huxley, Brave New World.

Read it before its too late.

He's dead so I don't think he's gonna be mad I shared this

“Move, you’re not a tree.”

Some of the greatest words every spoken.

Yes hello

Seen a lot of "live each day as if it was your last", indeed a powerful mindset that I respect

Yet I much prefer "Live each day as if it was a miracle"

It is hard to truly define and measure one’s decision-making abilities. But when you look at the broader picture, you can always tell if someone is good at making decisions or not. There are a few things that separate good decision-makers and those with a tendency to pick the wrong option.

One of those things is the ability to separate emotion from decision. In fact, the more emotional you are at the moment of making a decision, the more likely you are to make the wrong one. However, it’s also important to take into consideration that, in some cases, empathy can be used to make the right choices.

Empathy can be defined as the ability to understand emotions and feelings of other people. Having empathy for others might cause a person to consider the impact their decisions will have on others before making a decision. Empathy can also help a person understand the perspective of others and see the situation from their point of view, which can be helpful in resolving conflicts or finding mutually beneficial solutions.

On the other hand, decision-making that is driven solely by empathy can sometimes lead to biased or unbalanced decisions, as the decision-maker may prioritize the feelings or needs of one person or group over others. It is important for decision-makers to strike a balance and consider the broader context and potential consequences of their decisions.

So in short, in order to improve your decision-making, you must put your own emotions aside and use empathy to broaden your perspective and accept different viewpoints.

This will help you get a better grasp of the situation at hand but also understand the stakes of each person concerned with your decision (if any).

Ultimately, this gives you a larger choice of alternatives as you explore all potential solutions. By visualizing the bigger picture, you can make a more informed decision, as long as it is not driven solely by emotion.

One last thing that you should remember is that your past wrong decisions are a source to learn from about yourself and your tendencies. Reviewing where things went wrong allows you to learn from your past mistakes and avoid making the same ones again.

In short:

- Put emotions aside
- Use empathy to broaden your perspective
- Consider all alternatives
- Weigh pros and cons
- Avoid making the same mistakes

It is not that hard when you put it this way.

But decision-making can be challenging if you don’t approach it methodically, which is why the first step is to be objective. Because as long as you will worry and stress out about situations, you will keep approaching them the wrong way and end up going with the wrong choice

Join this space tomorrow if you have some time.

Usually lasts an hour, going to be an extremely interesting topic.

You might learn a few things

https://twitter.com/EgoDriv/status/1615013777270865921

WHO ARE YOU?

That's not a question I am asking you.

That's a question I invite you to ask yourself.

Because no matter what your answer is, that's what will define how I will see you (or anyone else).

Truth is:

People do not take the time to actually define themselves.

If you're one of those, I cannot stress enough how important it is that you take the time to ask yourself the right questions.

Who am I?

What do I think of myself?

Who do I want to become?

How can I become the person I want?

What am I insecure about? How can I fix it?

Who can I really count on? Why?

Unless you assess and put your finger on these things, it will be extremely difficult for you to feel fulfilled.

Unlike video games, life does not give you a stats menu.

But that's a good thing.

Why is it a good thing?

Because you get to pick which stats matter.

You get to choose what aspects of your life you deem important and worth improving.

Yes, I know money is one of the most important stats, that's what most people are constantly after.

But let me ask you something:

How do you plan on making more money if you don't even know what you're good/bad at?

We were born in an era of capitalism.

Your main capital is yourself. Invest in that.

Do an inventory of what's in your head and what you can offer to the world.

Explore yourself. Challenge yourself. Grow.

That's just how it works.

Or else, what happens?

What happens is that you will find yourself in a job you hate, surrounded by people you despise, living a life that feels like it's not yours.

You will feel like an impostor in your own life.

My friend, that's no way to be.

You have to want more.
You have to demand more from yourself.

But first, you have to get to know what hand you've been dealt.

Not doing introspective work (regularly to keep yourself in check) is like playing poker without looking at your hand.

You don't know where that will lead you.

That uncertainty will grow on you and create stress and feeling unfulfilled.

Is that what you want?

Is that the life you think you deserve?

I think you deserve better.

Do you agree?

Starting soon

How to Stop Being A People-Pleaser

There are way too many down sides to pleasing everyone.

One of them being taken advantage of and even disrespected by most people.

While the intention comes from a good heart; consequences on both social life and mental state are enormously harmful.

Being a people pleaser usually comes from lack of self-confidence.
They will subconsciously think that other's satisfaction is worth more than theirs.

In an attempt not to hurt their feelings or make others feel better about themselves, they will let others step on them.

While there is some sort of satisfaction in being altruistic, being a people pleaser is nothing but harm to every aspect of your persona

A people pleaser is NOT altruistic

They do so because they feel like they're not good enough to stand up to others
Nothing honorable about it

The first thing you want to do if you see yourself as a people pleaser but want to change that, is the following:

Make your opinion heard.

No matter how small or irrelevant the topic is, you should always have your own opinion on it.

Don't just agree with whoever is around.

Second thing is avoid apologizing to often, especially when you think you did nothing wrong.

Easier said than done for some people

Resist the urge of saying sorry just to get over with an uncomfortable situation.

Preserve your self-worth, after all you didn't do anything wrong

Third, stop worrying about disappointing others.

Just like you are understanding of their situation and feelings, they should be able to understand when you refuse to please them.

You don't owe anyone anything.

Realizing what you do wrong is the first step to fixing it.

Take small steps and do small changes on a daily basis.

There is absolutely no need for you to please anyone; but that you already know.

Fourth, force yourself to get out of your comfort zone.

By that I mean, reacting when people try to take advantage of you.

Although it is surely not easy for you to go to conflict, you should try to stop avoiding it.

Conflict is essential to life.
Practice and get good at it.

One thing that might help with accountability on the long run is the following:

Once you get home at the end of your day;

Write down all the times you said yes when you wanted to say no.
Write down the things you did while not wanting to do them.

Forcing yourself to realize those events will not let your subconscious bury it in memories

Side note:

Try implementing the advice of this thread progressively.

Trying to switch from black to white in no time will only lead you to becoming toxic.

You don't want to lose everyone around you, but you also don't want everyone around you to use you.

Find that balance.

Everyone wants to be influential.

Everyone wants to be charismatic.

Everyone wants to be magnetic and inspiring.

Here is how you can increase your social standing without seeking status symbols and without selling your soul to the devil.

1 - Stop Trying to Impress/Fit/Please:

This is the most common mistake.

This makes your whole approach wrong and your efforts worth nothing.

This is what leads people to become invasive and come off as needy try-hards.

It’s just wrong.

By trying to impress and fit, you sacrifice your authenticity and genuineness.

Which are literally everything.

2- Stop faking it, just be:

We all sense it when someone is pretending to be what they’re not.

It just stinks fakeness from miles away.

Drop this shit.

You’re overcomplicating this.

Copying others or pretending to be someone you’re not will never bring you respect.

It will do the exact opposite.

3- Positively Impact Your Environment:

What makes someone memorable?

Not their words. Not their outlook.

Their behavior and its impact on the people around them.

Instead of trying to improve your image in people’s eyes, try improving the quality of the time they spend around you.

I am NOT inciting you to go into people-pleasing.

I am telling you to stop being fake and/or boring.

How?

It’s easy.

3- Cultivating Passion:

If nothing is fueling your soul, you are de facto boring.

If there is nothing that interests you, how could you be interesting?

This is the main problem.

Most people suffer from plain and simple apathy.

The way around this is to actually define yourself and introduce yourself to yourself.

Sounds silly? Ok, then when was the last time you defined your 3 main interests? When was the last time you defined your core values? If someone asked you who you are; how many things would you have to say?

So let’s fix this.

Here is a little homework.

Define 3 things you love to spend your time on.

Define 5 principles you cannot betray.

Write down where you are in life professionally, emotionally, financially etc…

Write down goals for the coming decades, where are you going?

Define your routine

Define your ideal day (the routine you wish for)

It’s not about figuring out how to get there, it’s about knowing what “there” means.

Now that you’ve defined these things, had a small introspection; it’s time to be that person you described.

The idea here is to come up with your own sort of Manifesto.

Your own reference, a dedicated notebook where you express yourself and help yourself visualize and put your ideas into words and set up goals from there. This is your compass.

4- Value Your Word:

Most people either talk too much or not enough.

That’s because they either don’t value what comes out of their mouth or are too scared of how people will react to it.

Simple fix: Pick your words carefully while making sure you voice your opinion when needed.

You see, you don’t want to be invasive nor would you want other to see you as someone they can step on.

It’s important that you don’t become a “yes man” as much as it is important that you learn how to compromise.

This is why you need to learn the art of negotiation.

So you can properly defend your opinions and interests without making enemies.

Someone who can come up with win-win alternatives is someone people look up to.

Be that person. The problem solver.

A short story

Original post

Do not prepare for moments of doubt for 2 reasons:

- Moments of doubt need a new perspective, you will never be completely ready for it anyway.

- If your plan fails, you will feel like you've done everything you could. When it's not the case.

You have to acknowledge the fact that slow periods and doubtful moments are a blessing in disguise. They allow you to recollect and restructure. They allow you to fix your problems and keep going forward.

But if you fear them, and do everything to be "ready" for them, all you do is set it to last longer or force yourself to stay in the wrong direction.

You have to accept that things won't always work exactly how planned without being too fearful of it.

Look forward to it, as new obstacles and challenges are what makes you grow.

No matter how painful it can be, it is still the pain of growth.

And that is priceless.

Do you expect it to be easy?

If yes, I have another question for you...

Are you stupid?

If the answer to both questions is No, then you do realize that there is no alternative for putting in the reps and being consistent.

With time, what once seemed too hard and impossible will become too easy and nothing but a formality.

But the trick is to never get complacent, never feel like you've got it all.

You have to constantly keep pushing yourself for more.

All while being grateful for what you've achieved so far.

But that comes later.

What you first must do is lay out a plan to follow, a vision, a North star.

You need something to guide you or else you will cave in to temptations too easily.

And that's not easy feat.

We live in a time where everything is tailored to stimulate you and capture your attention.

You need to be smart enough to get your priorities straight.

You need a clear enough plan so you don't get lost along the way.

You need a strong willpower to be patient and trust the process.

You need enough self-awareness to realize that the long term game is where the gains at.

And you need to maintain those things every day.

Or else?

You're no better than the average man.

Is that what you want?

I'm sure it's not.

So let's start with the right questions...

What is it you truly want?
What's stopping you from getting it?
How can you get past that?

You see, just like you will understand people better by asking them questions, you will understand yourself better by asking the right questions.

As cheesy as it may sound:

You won't get the answers if you never ask.

I know it's hard to get unplugged from the routine and stress of the daily life.

But it has to come from you.

Do you want it bad enough?

If yes, you will save some time to work on your future.

You will stop living on autopilot and simply react to what life throws at you.

Start building, stop experiencing.

You were meant for way more than just being a spectator in other people's game.

Become a player.
Make moves.

You know it's the right thing to do.