I used to overshare a lot. I would tell anyone and everyone everything, thinking that my secrets were safe. But the reality was, the more I shared, the more my secrets got out.

One time, I remember telling a friend about a brand I wanted to start. I showed him all my ideas and designs and gave him access to all the information I was working on. I trusted him, and he said he could help me with it.

Fast forward a few months, and I'm looking for competitors. I come across a website and Instagram profile that do EXACTLY what I had in mind. It was as if someone implemented everything I was working on. And then, I saw it: my logo on their website.

I couldn't believe it. I had shared my idea with someone I thought I could trust, and now they had stolen it from me. It was a harsh lesson to learn, but it taught me two things:

First, when you get an idea, act fast.

Don't wait around and let someone else beat you to the punch. Take action, even if it's just a small step in the right direction. It could make all the difference.

Second, learn to keep your mouth shut.

Sharing too much information can cost you money, time, and even friendships. So, it's important to be selective about who you share your ideas with and how much you reveal.

The importance of these two principles cannot be overstated.

When you have an idea, act fast and be selective about who you share it with.

The less they know, the less they can ruin.

I may have lost an opportunity on that day, but I learned two valuable lessons that I’ll take with me to the grave.

And the truth is, someone like that who was ready to backstab me?

Did I really lose a friend?

I don’t think so.

When people hear the word ego, they often associate it with vanity or arrogance.

But in reality, ego is simply our sense of self.

It's how we perceive ourselves and our place in the world.

There's a common misconception that there's such a thing as a "big ego."

The truth is: there are strong egos and weak egos.

A strong ego is one that is self-validated, confident, and self-sufficient.

A weak ego, on the other hand, seeks validation from others and can be either arrogant or humble.

For example, let's say you're at a party, and someone is making negative comment about your outfit.

A person with a weak ego might feel embarrassed or even lash out in anger.

You might say something like, "Well, at least I don't dress like a clown!" in an attempt to make yourself feel better.

Others will freeze and simply feel like shit.

Both have a weak ego, because both live through the eyes of others.

What people say about them matters to them and defines their identity.

This is what a weak ego means.

In contrast, a person with a strong ego might brush off the comment and say something like, "Thanks for the feedback, but I like it."

They are self-validated and confident in their own choices and don't feel the need to seek validation from others.

People think having a strong ego means being an asshole.

That’s not true.

A person who puts others down or belittles them is not confident or self-validated.

They are seeking validation through negative means, which is a sign of a weak ego.

Ego is not the enemy.

It's a natural and necessary part of who we are.

The key is to develop a strong and healthy ego that is self-validated, confident, and self-sufficient.

Don't seek validation from others or put them down to feel better about yourself.

Focus on your own growth and development, and don't let anyone else define your sense of self.

Never underestimate people's ability to make stupid decisions.

Seriously, it happens more often than you think. Whether it's in relationships, finances, or career choices, people can be prone to making thoughtless choices that affect not only themselves but also those around them.

Now, if you've got some skin in the game and their choices impact you, it's your responsibility to step in.

Warn them, loud and clear. Make it unmistakable. Share your experiences, knowledge, and insights to help them see the potential pitfalls they might be overlooking.

Eliminate any doubt.

You want to avoid giving them any chance to claim you kept them in the dark.

Trust me, you don't want to get to that

Why? Simple. They'll mess it all up, and then, guess who they'll point their finger at? That's right—YOU.

To prevent these blunders from happening, it's essential to recognize the signs.

Are they acting impulsively? Do they have a history of poor decision-making? Are they failing to consider the long-term consequences? If you spot these red flags, it's time to intervene.

And remember, intervention doesn't have to be negative or confrontational. It can be supportive and empowering.

Offer them guidance and resources to help them make better decisions. Encourage them to think critically and analyze the situation from different perspectives.

Share stories of people who've been in similar situations and how they overcame those challenges. Real-life examples can be powerful motivators and can often help others recognize the potential dangers they face.

Make them realize you're on their side and not against them.

Otherwise they'll get defensive.

Don't shy away from asking difficult questions.

As uncomfortable as it can get, that's the only way to have more thoughtful decisions and, ultimately, a better outcome for everyone involved.

Of course, you can't control other people's actions.

But by being proactive and lending a helping hand, you can at least steer them in the right direction. And if they still choose to ignore your advice and make a mistake, at least you'll know you did everything in your power to help.

You can minimize the negative consequences of these missteps and, hopefully, help those around you learn valuable lessons.

Don't just stand there and watch the trainwreck unfold. Waiting for them to fuck it up to blame them for it.

Don't play their game.

Step in and make a difference.

Share your knowledge, offer support, and be the person who helps.

We all have our own bullshit - negative habits and behaviors that hold us back. But the first step to changing them is awareness. When we become aware of our negative tendencies, we can start to take action to change them.

One effective way to do this is through negative reinforcement.

Telling yourself a strict "No" when you're about to relapse into an old habit or stopping a negative train of thoughts by loudly saying "No I shouldn't think like that".

The fun part?

Just like we can catch ourselves when we're misbehaving and cut it short, we can also do the same with others.

For example, let's say you have a friend who is always interrupting you when you speak. Instead of letting them continue, you can negatively reinforce this behavior by interrupting them back and letting them know that it's not okay.

Or, let's say you have a colleague who is always late for meetings. You can negatively reinforce this behavior by starting the meeting without them and letting them know that their tardiness is not acceptable.

The key to negative reinforcement is to catch the behavior early and address it immediately. By doing so, you're sending a clear message that the behavior is not acceptable, and you're less likely to see it happen again.

Keep in mind: This is not a substitute for positive reinforcement, which is a more effective long-term strategy for changing behavior.

It's to be used right on the spot.

Positive reinforcement involves rewarding desirable behavior with praise or recognition.

For example, if your friend listens to you without interrupting, you can positively reinforce this behavior by thanking them and letting them know how much you appreciate it.

Conversely, rewarding yourself for what you do well will encourage you to do it more often and repeat it again.

Basic Pavlov conditioning.

That's how we all operate.

When I tell you that once you understand yourself, your social skills skyrocket, this is what I mean. We're all humans and we operate in very similar ways.

Understand yourself and the world will make sense.

It becomes so much easier to deal with others when you learn how to deal with your own crap.

Once you decide to cut ties with someone, don't look back.

Don't give a second chance, don't second guess yourself.

Move on and turn the page.

Remove them from your existence.

You disrespect yourself any time you open your door to someone who's repeatedly crossed the line with you.

There are boundaries that should not be crossed.

If you set them clearly and effectively yet find people crossing them, it simply means they have no respect for you.

Your duty was to let them know where you draw the line.

Their duty was to respect that.

If they don't, you HAVE to walk away.

It's not just "okay" to do so.

It is necessary.

Understand this:

Most people are replaceable and most people are temporary.

When their date expires, it's time to throw them out and get a new entourage.

Not everyone is supposed to stay forever.

Make peace with this fact and stop giving second chances to people who don't deserve them.

Grand Rising:

We'll be on a Twitter space today for anyone who wants to chime in

https://twitter.com/EgoDriv/status/1651527622105477122

FULL EXPLANATION COMING.

You need mentors not role models.

You need people who will show you the way.

Not people you copy.

Mentors can help you avoid mistakes, identify opportunities, and provide a sounding board for your ideas and plans.

They can share their own successes and failures, and help you develop the skills and mindset needed to achieve your goals.

The key difference between a role model and a mentor is that a role model is someone you simply admire and want to copy, whereas a mentor is someone who actively supports and guides you towards your goals.

When you try to copy a role model, you WILL end up feeling like a fraud.

You'll never be as good as them at being them.

Common fucking sense.

The worst part?

You'll miss out on the unique talents and strengths that make you who you are.

But with a mentor, you can learn from their experiences and apply those lessons to your own life and goals.

You can carve your own way, while still benefiting from the guidance and support of someone who has been there before.

Of course, mistakes are still inevitable.

You will make your own mistakes, and that's okay.

In fact, it's a necessary part of the learning process.

But with the help of a qualified mentor, you can minimize those mistakes and fast-track your progress towards success.

Now the question is:

How can you find a mentor?

They say:

"When the Student Is Ready, the Teacher Will Appear"

Sounds vague but bears a lot of implications.

The answer is that you need to get started on your own and make as many connections as possible.

There won't be ONE person that shows you everything.

It is YOUR duty to develop the ability to connect with people and learn from them.

When you're in the trenches, you can learn from everyone.

Whether it is how to do it or how not to do it.

But again, the most important part is to actually get started and become eager to improve in that area you picked.

More often than not, people will come to you and offer advice.

Because they will genuinely appreciate your passion and dedication.

For you to find mentors, you must first be worthy of them.

Work on your competence.

How to organize a Rebellion:

This is going to be a fun one lol

In my teenage years, one of my favorite activity was to join Facebook groups and simply make sure to destroy them.

I had my own football groups on Facebook and I wanted to make of it the ONE reference group in the niche.

My plan? Destroy the other groups so only mine exists.

I was young and spineless.

I don't recommend doing what I'm about to say unless you have good reasons to.

I would join a group, post in it regularly in order to become a valued member.

Once that status achieved, I would befriend moderators and start creating internal beef in the group between members.

All while keeping my hands clean.

They were fighting, I was just observing (for now).

I'd report the fight to the admin and moderators.

And once they took action to solve it; I'd do one of two things:

- If they banned the members fighting, I'd start complaining about injustice and tyranny within the group.

- If they didn't ban the members, I'd start complaining about how the group was poorly ran.

Both cases, people will side with you.

En masse.

All you have left to do is invite them to a "new" and "better" group.

My group.

Believe it or not, this worked in more than 20 groups in the span of 3 months.

In short:

- Make a place for yourself within the group
- Start drama
- Complain how it was handled
- Offer a new solution
- Get banned from the group
- Get hundreds of new members on my group

It's ridiculous how doing this got me over 5000 members from many groups around.

BUT, this is the important part:

If you ever do this, know that people will try to take revenge.

My group was eventually banned by Facebook because "my victims" reported it en masse.

But hey! It was a fun experience.

Take some time to read this:

https://twitter.com/EgoDriv/status/1653024730511712258

Never bring your ego down to your low level of competence.

Increase your level of competence to match your ego.

You gotta get that ego hurt as much as possible for it to be real.

You have to challenge your own self-image and let it prove its worth.

Take the L as a reason to get better and live up to your own expectations.

Don't take it as a threat to your self-image.

A strong ego looks forward to adversity.

A weak ego shies away from it.

You have to see your failures as extra motivation to increase your competence to match your ego.

You don't bring your ego down to match your low level of competence.

This should be common sense.

You should work to live up to your self-image not take it for granted.

Our self-image is what helps us keep going.

If you accept your low level of competence, you will put yourself in a box of limiting beliefs that is hard to break out of.

But if instead...

You accept your ego as the real version of you:

Then you accept that you have work to do to live up to the idea you hold of yourself.

The ego is not the enemy.

But refusing to accept that we have work to do to match those expectations make it seem so.

Because most people would either give up or blame their shortcomings on others.

Both are weak egos that avoid taking responsibility.

Having a strong ego does not mean being arrogant.

It means you're aware that you are the only one responsible for yourself.

And that any failure is a sign that there is work to do.

Your ego has to be hurt.

You have to accept that it needs to be challenged and that the only way to get over it is by objectively increasing your competence level.

Again:

Never bring your ego down to your low level of competence.

Increase your level of competence to match your ego.

I have no respect for those who seek pity.

I've said it before, those who deserve compassion do not beg for it.

Those who deserve help and support do not expose their vulnerabilities in an attempt to make you feel bad.

That's just wrong;

Those who deserve help are the ones that simply ask for help.

Not those who put up an act and portray themselves as helpless victims.

This doesn't mean you should never get help.

It means don't beg.

And many can't even differentiate between both.

I would rather help someone who simply tells me:

"Hey man I need your help"

Than someone that claims they are helpless and don't even directly ask for your help.

Trying to leverage people's emotions to get what you want is dishonest.

No matter your real situation.

Be more real.
More straightforward.

Especially when you need someone's help.

Don't go with the manipulative approach.

It's despicable.

Before you decide to help someone, ask yourself if they're ready to help themselves.

Not everyone deserves your compassion.

Not everyone deserves your help.

For example, you'd rather financially help someone who you've noticed is struggling.

Than give money to a beggar on the street.

One is already doing their best, and the other is seeking the easy way out.

What would the world be if we all relied on each other?

Absolutely fucking nothing.

Our best advancements as a civilization came from individuals who went for the self-sufficient way.

And I'm not talking about being a lone wolf.

I'm talking about genuinely seeking to address your own needs on your own and then add your positive contribution to humanity.

Human civilization is a result of the compounded efforts of special individuals who decide to give to the world rather than take from it.

To be extraordinary, you must first be self-sufficient.

To leave an imprint on the world and build a legacy, you must first be self-sufficient.

You cannot build anything worthy while counting on others to give you anything.

It's when we all get to a stage of self-reliance that we can come together and add up our positive contributions to create synergies.

1 + 1 can be equal to 3 if we create those synergy effects.

But 1-1 will always be worth zero no matter how you look at it.

We need more givers in this world.

And to have more givers, we must rely on ourselves at an individual level so we can better serve the community.

Fuck relying on each other.

Let's rely on ourselves and meet halfway to build something worthy.

A complete detachment from people's actions and behavior is the first and only step you will ever take to meet your ideal self.

As long as you will be conditioned and limited by people's opinions and perception of you:

You will be a slave to an idea that doesn't even exist.

Understand that how people perceive you is nothing but a singular irrelevant idea that they have entertained from their own limited perception of what you are.

Nobody will ever understand you and feel for you as much as you will do so for yourself.

Thread time

https://twitter.com/EgoDriv/status/1653389990351568899

Most of you probably do not know Dylan Thiry but his story is as fun as it is annoying.

He's a French influencer who repeatedly scammed people without getting exposed (until recently).

Fascinating because he's a completely dork that still gets his way.

Doesn't look like a tight call, maybe I should get started on writing about Mourinho 😂

José Mourinho, known by many as The Special One and The Enemy of Football, undeniably leaves an impressive legacy.

The perfect example of how a balanced and healthy ego can lead to success, Mourinho's journey is worth analyzing not only from a sports perspective but also in terms of character development.

Mourinho never played professional football; he was a midfielder for various amateur and youth teams in Portugal.

However, he went on to excel as one of the greatest football managers of all time.

His success is attributed not only to his tactical genius but also to his strong character, which allowed him to bring out the best in his players, regardless of the cost.

Mourinho's approach to winning is unique. He doesn't obsess over winning; rather, he sees losing as simply not an option.

Adopting the "I have nothing to lose" mindset, Mourinho instills a sense of being underdogs in his players.

This approach often leads to astonishing performances, especially with clubs that were not favorites to win championships.

Mourinho's ability to inspire players and make them feel like they have more to give is simply fascinating.

He doesn't talk down to his players but conveys the idea that having nothing to lose means having everything to gain.

This results in a deep commitment and admiration from players who never thought they could achieve greatness.

As a manager, Mourinho rallies his team by challenging their beliefs about themselves and pushing them beyond their limits.

He has an undeniable aura and brings it with him wherever he goes.

His confidence in his own abilities is contagious, and being around him makes people feel like they're living a dream.

This confidence also translates into Mourinho's role as a spokesperson for the club. While some might think he seeks attention, there is a deeper tactical genius at play.

As a true leader, Mourinho puts himself on the line and takes the heat, using his confrontational and communicative nature to protect his players and staff.

By drawing attention to himself, he shields his team from criticism.

His actions might seem counterintuitive, but he is often several steps ahead. Although not purely altruistic, there is a genuine balance between benefiting himself and benefiting those around him.

His competence backs up his arrogance and cockiness, and his fearlessness makes others feel empowered.

Interestingly, his confidence not only benefits him but also unnerves his opponents.

He masterfully manipulates power dynamics and human nature to influence and disturb his rivals while simultaneously motivating and boosting the confidence of his own players.

For instance, he might publicly claim to have seen the opposing manager enter the referee's room during halftime, causing disruption on both sides and giving his players an advantage by sensing instability in the opposition.

José Mourinho is a complex public figure, often compared to the modern-day Machiavelli.

He has transformed mediocre teams into champions with his deep understanding of the game.

From a translator to a legend, his unwavering ego has been the driving force throughout his career.

His self-image is so solid that he can openly choose to be criticized to protect those who rely on him.

Outspoken and self-assured, he isn't afraid of criticism (and occasionally owns up to his mistakes).

But he does everything to win and ensures those around him win too.

Mourinho's success didn't come overnight.

He worked as an assistant for over ten years before making a name for himself, honing his skills and learning from the best.

This period allowed him to gain the experience and competence required to become the formidable figure he is today.

Of course, one of the things that make him so special is that beyond being good, Mourinho crosses the line.

He does it often.

But you always know he talks from his heart, or at least he makes sure you think so.

An admirable character because you never know what he's planning, you just know that you need him on your side rather than against you.

His charisma alone does half the job.

His infinite ambition does the rest.

The funniest part is that they say "ego destroys relationships".

But infinite are the examples of people who were close to him and openly spoke about how much trust they have in him:

"I would leave the pitch in a coffin for him" - John Terry, played under him at Chelsea

"I always refused to change position, but I would do it if Mourinho asks me to" - Samuel Etoo

And if you're not particularly knowledgeable about football, those are two icons of the game.

Rare are the people who actually dislike him.

Even less so the people who were close to him.

This is just another message from me:

There are people with a healthy ego and use it to achieve crazy things.

In fact, most of the people who actually manage to achieve anything extraordinary have an incredibly solid self-image.

Remember this story when someone tells you that ego is the enemy.