Fart when people hug you. Makes them feel strong.

Today, you forgot something that you will never ever remember again.

5 sometimes feels more like an even number than 6

Maybe I just don't deserve to be loved.

Sorry I didn't text you back. I was pretending I didn't see it and I ended up actually forgetting.

Sometimes one becomes bad without wanting to

Being pregnant, you technically have two hearts inside of you. This makes you a time lord.

The only advantage Android users have over iPhone users is they can access blocked channels here

The most romantic thing a woman can give a man is Peace.