Technically The Sun is at the bottom of the food chain

The saddest part about metamorphosis is that there are no baby butterflies

Teacher: How do you call mosquitoes in ypur languages

Lazy me: We dont call them they come by their own

She was my crush until I saw her going to the toilet holding a ዳንጎቴ cement paper.

You start looking through someones Instagram and you end up on their cousins brother's wife's sister's profile looking at pics from Bangkok in 2014

(First date)

Her: I'm a Catholic

Stupid Me: (trying to impress her) I'm addicted to cats too

Whats up with the " ye set lij "sedeb is there anyone who came out of a man?

Me: I should probably just wait for her to reply

Also me: Double text her, just in case

*gets left on read for an hour*

Me, again: Man, I shouldn’t exist!

The only white man you can trust is a dead white man.

Robert Gabriel Mugabe

A blade that can cut stone like butter will still cut butter like it's butter.

The thought of having a day off is more exciting than the day off itself

Just because birds can fly they think they have the right to literally shit on everyone else.

Someone probably started a long jail sentence the day you where born and is still in.

Most photos of food on the internet are now shit.