YOLO is used both to convince people to do something, and not to do something

@deepthoughts2

Him: ብቸኝነት የሚያስጠላህ ጀርባህን ሲበላህ ነዉ

Me: Bro ቀልዱን ትተህ ገላህን ታጠብ

@deepthoughts2

There's a guy who smokes 2 cigarettes together

They asked him: why do you always smoke 2 cigarettes together?

He said: one for me, and one for my brother in prison.

After a while they saw him smoking one cigarette only and they asked him: so your brother is out of the jail?

He said: no, I stopped smoking.

@deepthoughts2

We form habits, and eventually those habits form us.

@deepthoughts2

Walter White from the show "Breaking Bad" never tried meth yet he was the one most addicted to it

@deepthoughts2

Behind every bad product was a room full of people who thought it was a good idea.

@deepthoughts2

Why can’t feminists do algebra?

Because algebra is acctually about making it equal

@deepthoughts2

Major part of parenting is pretending to be excited by very boring things.

@deepthoughts2

Apparently, Indians use only their right hands to eat because they wipe their bottoms with their left hands.

Personally, I don't eat while I'm having a shit.

@deepthoughts2

An identical twin getting plastic surgery must be insulting to the other twin.

@deepthoughts2

Why is Dark spelled with a K and not a C?
Because you can’t C in the Dark

@deepthoughts2

A major milestone in men's maturity is when they stop putting up with annoying ladies just because they're hot.

@deepthoughts2

Happiness is not the absence of conflict, but the ability to cope with it.

@deepthoughts2

The dumbest thing we wished for growing up was to be an adult.

@deepthoughts2

Be a nice human.

You trust the bank with all of your money and finances, but they don’t even trust you not to take their 5 birr pens.

@deepthoughts2

Eid-Mubarak my muslim subscribers.

*first date

Her: I love bad boys

Me: *trying to impress her* my mom doesn't know where I am

@deepthoughts2

Unconditional love is wonderful. Unconditional support is dangerous.

@deepthoughts2

The most depressing job in the world must be the person who adds audience laughter to sitcoms.

@deepthoughts2

The selfies you delete from your phone is the real you.

@deepthoughts2