I have grieved for sooo long for this 'ideal childhood' I held soo much anger nd resentment for my parents.
I could not let go of the pain and suffering they caused me .
Although I understand Allah gave me my parents but I could not accept my life nd how it was back then because I kept thinking I could have done better or changed or maybe it was my fault.
Yes our parents need to take accountability nd responsibility but do you really want to punish them or continue punishing yourself for whst could or could not be?
Coming to terms with your past nd remembering that Allah decreed everything is actually very comforting because it stops you from comparing nd romanticising .
You could get all the love in the world nd still be a menace in the world!
If Allah thought every home had to be born with ideal perfect parents then He would have given that.
Your trials and tribulations made you who are today.
This is why you value what you have today!
I could not let go of the pain and suffering they caused me .
Although I understand Allah gave me my parents but I could not accept my life nd how it was back then because I kept thinking I could have done better or changed or maybe it was my fault.
Yes our parents need to take accountability nd responsibility but do you really want to punish them or continue punishing yourself for whst could or could not be?
Coming to terms with your past nd remembering that Allah decreed everything is actually very comforting because it stops you from comparing nd romanticising .
You could get all the love in the world nd still be a menace in the world!
If Allah thought every home had to be born with ideal perfect parents then He would have given that.
Your trials and tribulations made you who are today.
This is why you value what you have today!
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A person came to Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) and asked, "Who among people is most deserving of my fine treatment?" He (ﷺ) said, "Your mother". He again asked, ''Who next?" "Your mother", the Prophet (ﷺ) replied again. He asked, "Who next?" He (the Prophet (ﷺ)) said again, "Your mother." He again asked, "Then who?" Thereupon he (ﷺ) said," Then your father."
In another narration: "O Messenger of Allah! Who is most deserving of my fine treatment?" He (ﷺ) said, "Your mother, then your mother, then your mother, then your father, then your nearest, then nearest".
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].
Riyad as-Salihin 316
Hadith 316
In another narration: "O Messenger of Allah! Who is most deserving of my fine treatment?" He (ﷺ) said, "Your mother, then your mother, then your mother, then your father, then your nearest, then nearest".
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].
Riyad as-Salihin 316
Hadith 316
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Disciplining children is not about imposing punishment, but about imparting wisdom. It's not about asserting control, but about nurturing their growth. When we explain the reasoning behind our boundaries and consequences with kindness and compassion, we help them develop a deeper understanding of themselves and the world around them.
By doing so, we create a supportive environment where they can learn from their mistakes, take ownership of their actions, and cultivate a sense of responsibility. This approach not only fosters a stronger bond between parent and child but also lays the foundation for a lifelong journey of self-discovery and moral guidance.
By disciplining with empathy and understanding, we empower our children to develop a strong sense of self, a clear moral compass, and the essential skills they need to navigate life's challenges with confidence and resilience. This perspective emphasizes the importance of explanatory discipline, which focuses on teaching, guiding, and nurturing children, rather than simply punishing them.
~ 𝓙𝓸𝓾𝓻𝓷𝓮𝔂 𝓸𝓯 𝓛𝓲𝓯𝓮
By doing so, we create a supportive environment where they can learn from their mistakes, take ownership of their actions, and cultivate a sense of responsibility. This approach not only fosters a stronger bond between parent and child but also lays the foundation for a lifelong journey of self-discovery and moral guidance.
By disciplining with empathy and understanding, we empower our children to develop a strong sense of self, a clear moral compass, and the essential skills they need to navigate life's challenges with confidence and resilience. This perspective emphasizes the importance of explanatory discipline, which focuses on teaching, guiding, and nurturing children, rather than simply punishing them.
~ 𝓙𝓸𝓾𝓻𝓷𝓮𝔂 𝓸𝓯 𝓛𝓲𝓯𝓮
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If you find yourself loving one of your children more than the others, try as much as possible to not let it be obvious. Treat them equally.
Parental favoritism has caused damaged to alot of kids. It brings enmity between children and sometimes leads to low self-esteem, especially to the unfavoured ones.
Parental favoritism has caused damaged to alot of kids. It brings enmity between children and sometimes leads to low self-esteem, especially to the unfavoured ones.
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READ THIS, IT'S BEAUTIFUL ❤🐝🦋
A mother's destiny is to wait for her children.
She waits for them even before they're born.
She waits for them after school.
She waits for them to come home after a night out.
She waits as they build their own lives.
She waits for them to return home after work, ready with a warm meal.
She waits with love, with worry, and sometimes with frustration that fades the moment she sees them and can hold them close.
Don't let your dear mother wait any longer. Call her, visit her, love her, hug the one who loves you like no one else ever will.
Don't make her wait—she's hoping for this from you.
Because though her body may age, a mother's heart never grows old. Love her while you can. No one will ever love you like your mother does.
Don't make your mother wait. Love her while you can. ❤🌻🦋
A mother's destiny is to wait for her children.
She waits for them even before they're born.
She waits for them after school.
She waits for them to come home after a night out.
She waits as they build their own lives.
She waits for them to return home after work, ready with a warm meal.
She waits with love, with worry, and sometimes with frustration that fades the moment she sees them and can hold them close.
Don't let your dear mother wait any longer. Call her, visit her, love her, hug the one who loves you like no one else ever will.
Don't make her wait—she's hoping for this from you.
Because though her body may age, a mother's heart never grows old. Love her while you can. No one will ever love you like your mother does.
Don't make your mother wait. Love her while you can. ❤🌻🦋
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The first man a girl admires is her father.
Daughters will always look up to their fathers as their hero, loyal guardian and protective shield, with whom she can find hope, shelter and protection.
The most cowardly thing a father can do, is to turn a blind eye to the suffering of his daughter after she is married and abandon her to her fate. It will break her heart, shatter her world and make her lose all hope.
As a father, you should teach your daughter to be dutiful and live honourably with her husband.
Tell the man who wishes to marry your daughter: “I am entrusting my daughter to you. I treated her with kindness and respect when she was with me. I expect nothing less from you.”
Most likely, nothing will happen and life will be good, but IF he then abuses her, unleash hell and make sure he faces the full consequences of his behaviour.
If the father is no longer present, then this duty falls on the shoulders of her brothers.
https://news.1rj.ru/str/MuslimChildrenTips
Daughters will always look up to their fathers as their hero, loyal guardian and protective shield, with whom she can find hope, shelter and protection.
The most cowardly thing a father can do, is to turn a blind eye to the suffering of his daughter after she is married and abandon her to her fate. It will break her heart, shatter her world and make her lose all hope.
As a father, you should teach your daughter to be dutiful and live honourably with her husband.
Tell the man who wishes to marry your daughter: “I am entrusting my daughter to you. I treated her with kindness and respect when she was with me. I expect nothing less from you.”
Most likely, nothing will happen and life will be good, but IF he then abuses her, unleash hell and make sure he faces the full consequences of his behaviour.
If the father is no longer present, then this duty falls on the shoulders of her brothers.
https://news.1rj.ru/str/MuslimChildrenTips
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Forwarded from Muslim Marriage Tips
As you sow, so shall u reap.
History repent by itself.
What it goes, comes around.
History repent by itself.
What it goes, comes around.
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"Between you and Allāh is your prayer, and between you and people is your Akhlaq"
That's how we should raise our children.
That's how we should raise our children.
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Forwarded from Muslim Marriage Tips
A father doesn't just have a financial duty towards his kids...
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The Prophets were Fathers of Daughters
http://dusunnah.com/article/the-prophets-were-fathers-of-daughters-ibn-qayyim/
http://dusunnah.com/article/the-prophets-were-fathers-of-daughters-ibn-qayyim/
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Fear of Your Parents' Old Age
"There is a break in the family history, where the ages accumulate and overlap, and the natural order makes no sense: it’s when the child becomes the parent of their parent."
It’s when the father grows older and begins to move as if he were walking through fog. Slowly, slowly, imprecisely.
It’s when one of the parents who once held your hand firmly when you were little no longer wants to be alone.
It’s when the father, once strong and unbeatable, weakens and takes two breaths before rising from his seat.
It’s when the father, who once commanded and ordered, now only sighs, only groans, and searches for where the door and window are—every hallway now feels distant.
It’s when one of the parents, once willing and hardworking, struggles to dress themselves and forgets to take their medication.
And we, as their children, will do nothing but accept that we are responsible for that life.
The life that gave birth to us depends on our life to die in peace.
Every child is the parent of their parent's death. Perhaps the old age of a father or mother is, curiously, the final pregnancy.
Our last lesson. An opportunity to return the care and love they gave us for decades.
And just as we adapted our homes to care for our babies, blocking power outlets and setting up playpens, we will now rearrange the furniture for our parents.
The first transformation happens in the bathroom. We will be the parents of our parents, the ones who now install a grab bar in the shower.
The grab bar is emblematic. The grab bar is symbolic. The grab bar inaugurates the "unsteadiness of the waters."
Because the shower, simple and refreshing, now becomes a storm for the old feet of our protectors.
We cannot leave them for even a moment.
The home of someone who cares for their parents will have grab bars along the walls. And our arms will extend in the form of railings.
Aging is walking while holding onto objects; aging is even climbing stairs without steps. We will be strangers in our own homes. We will observe every detail with fear and unfamiliarity, with doubt and concern.
We will be architects, designers, frustrated engineers. How did we not foresee that our parents would get sick and need us?
We will regret the sofas, the statues, and the spiral staircase. We will regret all the obstacles and the carpet.
Happy is the child who becomes the parent of their parent before their death, and unfortunate is the child who only appears at the funeral and doesn't say goodbye a little each day.
My friend Joseph Klein accompanied his father until his final moments.
In the hospital, the nurse was maneuvering to move him from the bed to the stretcher, trying to change the sheets when Joe shouted from his seat: Let me help you. He gathered his strength and, for the first time, took his father into his arms. He placed his father's face against his chest.
He cradled his father, consumed by cancer: small, wrinkled, fragile, trembling. He held him for a long time, the time equivalent to his childhood, the time equivalent to his adolescence, a long time, an endless time. By Your Side Nothing Hurts
Rocking his father back and forth. Caressing his father. Calming his father. And he said softly:
- I'm here, I'm here, Dad! "What a father wants to hear at the end of his life is that his child is there."
I love you, Dad, wherever you are, I always think of you, I will never forget you...
Credits to the rightful owner
"There is a break in the family history, where the ages accumulate and overlap, and the natural order makes no sense: it’s when the child becomes the parent of their parent."
It’s when the father grows older and begins to move as if he were walking through fog. Slowly, slowly, imprecisely.
It’s when one of the parents who once held your hand firmly when you were little no longer wants to be alone.
It’s when the father, once strong and unbeatable, weakens and takes two breaths before rising from his seat.
It’s when the father, who once commanded and ordered, now only sighs, only groans, and searches for where the door and window are—every hallway now feels distant.
It’s when one of the parents, once willing and hardworking, struggles to dress themselves and forgets to take their medication.
And we, as their children, will do nothing but accept that we are responsible for that life.
The life that gave birth to us depends on our life to die in peace.
Every child is the parent of their parent's death. Perhaps the old age of a father or mother is, curiously, the final pregnancy.
Our last lesson. An opportunity to return the care and love they gave us for decades.
And just as we adapted our homes to care for our babies, blocking power outlets and setting up playpens, we will now rearrange the furniture for our parents.
The first transformation happens in the bathroom. We will be the parents of our parents, the ones who now install a grab bar in the shower.
The grab bar is emblematic. The grab bar is symbolic. The grab bar inaugurates the "unsteadiness of the waters."
Because the shower, simple and refreshing, now becomes a storm for the old feet of our protectors.
We cannot leave them for even a moment.
The home of someone who cares for their parents will have grab bars along the walls. And our arms will extend in the form of railings.
Aging is walking while holding onto objects; aging is even climbing stairs without steps. We will be strangers in our own homes. We will observe every detail with fear and unfamiliarity, with doubt and concern.
We will be architects, designers, frustrated engineers. How did we not foresee that our parents would get sick and need us?
We will regret the sofas, the statues, and the spiral staircase. We will regret all the obstacles and the carpet.
Happy is the child who becomes the parent of their parent before their death, and unfortunate is the child who only appears at the funeral and doesn't say goodbye a little each day.
My friend Joseph Klein accompanied his father until his final moments.
In the hospital, the nurse was maneuvering to move him from the bed to the stretcher, trying to change the sheets when Joe shouted from his seat: Let me help you. He gathered his strength and, for the first time, took his father into his arms. He placed his father's face against his chest.
He cradled his father, consumed by cancer: small, wrinkled, fragile, trembling. He held him for a long time, the time equivalent to his childhood, the time equivalent to his adolescence, a long time, an endless time. By Your Side Nothing Hurts
Rocking his father back and forth. Caressing his father. Calming his father. And he said softly:
- I'm here, I'm here, Dad! "What a father wants to hear at the end of his life is that his child is there."
I love you, Dad, wherever you are, I always think of you, I will never forget you...
Credits to the rightful owner
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