You are somebody's reason to masturbate.

@deepthoughts2

I sell mirrors in the city of the blind

@deepthoughts2

There is a point in childhood where you stop getting praised for long sleeps, and start getting chastised for them.

@deepthoughts2

Advertising is how rich people beg.

@deepthoughts2

*Movie turns out great

Producers: Why don't we make another part and ruin it

@deepthoughts2

After break up

Girls: *likes sad quotes on IG

Boys: *Starts following random girls and likes booty pics

@deepthoughts2

If you pay me I'll show up to ur funeral but stand really far away hold a black umbrella regardless the weather, so that people think you died with dark and interesting secret.

@deepthoughts2

If you haven't found your Eve or Adam by now, then you are probably the snake

@deepthoughts2

Effort is important but knowing where to make an effort is important

@deepthoughts2

Why don't you delete the music you always skip on the phone.

@deepthoughts2

During sex, men are concentrating on holding off orgasm while women are focusing on achieving it.

@deepthoughts2

Send us your thoughts and feedback at @deepthoughts2Bot

I was feeling lonely so I bought some shares

It's nice to have some company

@deepthoughts2

Ya'll stop saying "ማነዉ" when someone knocking on door knowing that he gonna say "እኔ ነኝ".

@deepthoughts2