English is a language, not a measurement of intelligence.

@deepthoughts2

Why is your nose in the middle of your face?

Because it's the scenter.

@deepthoughts2

Instead of leaving a better planet for the children, how about we leave better children for the planet?

@deepthoughts2

Money is never actually yours, it’s just your turn to spend it.

@deepthoughts2

*getting my hair braided*
ፀጉር ቤት lady: ካመመሽ ንገሪኝ እሺ
Me :ok

Me:አመመኝ
ፀጉር ቤት lady: ኧረ? እሺ, ኡፍፍ ኡፍፍ
አሁንስ?
Me:

@deepthoughts2

Everyone wants to be unique while hoping to find a place they can fit in.

@deepthoughts2

You failed again to detect the exact moment of you falling asleep.

@deepthoughts2

Trying to laugh by a meme I already know , same as trying to twerk with የዜግነት ክብር!!

@deepthoughts2

You know you’re old when you slip and fall but no one laughs.

@deepthoughts2

It's sort of lame when lil kids act like adults. I see my dad looking at them like "I wanna switch kids"🥺

@deepthoughts2

YOLO is used both to convince people to do something, and not to do something

@deepthoughts2

Him: ብቸኝነት የሚያስጠላህ ጀርባህን ሲበላህ ነዉ

Me: Bro ቀልዱን ትተህ ገላህን ታጠብ

@deepthoughts2

There's a guy who smokes 2 cigarettes together

They asked him: why do you always smoke 2 cigarettes together?

He said: one for me, and one for my brother in prison.

After a while they saw him smoking one cigarette only and they asked him: so your brother is out of the jail?

He said: no, I stopped smoking.

@deepthoughts2

We form habits, and eventually those habits form us.

@deepthoughts2

Walter White from the show "Breaking Bad" never tried meth yet he was the one most addicted to it

@deepthoughts2

Behind every bad product was a room full of people who thought it was a good idea.

@deepthoughts2

Why can’t feminists do algebra?

Because algebra is acctually about making it equal

@deepthoughts2

Major part of parenting is pretending to be excited by very boring things.

@deepthoughts2

Apparently, Indians use only their right hands to eat because they wipe their bottoms with their left hands.

Personally, I don't eat while I'm having a shit.

@deepthoughts2

An identical twin getting plastic surgery must be insulting to the other twin.

@deepthoughts2