Forwarded from Jannah is Our Dream
When a servant is hot tempered we play with him just as kids play with a ball .. said the devil.
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Ibn ‘Umar, [may Allāh be pleased with him and his father], said:
“O’ you there! Teach and guide your son in cultivating good manners because, as a parent, you hold a responsibility for him, and in turn, he bears the responsibility of reflecting your kindness.”
Mawsū‘ah ibn Abi ad-Dunyah, 8/78 | Al-Imam ibn Abi Dunyah, [may Allāh bestow mercy upon him].
Translation: Authentic Quotes
“O’ you there! Teach and guide your son in cultivating good manners because, as a parent, you hold a responsibility for him, and in turn, he bears the responsibility of reflecting your kindness.”
Mawsū‘ah ibn Abi ad-Dunyah, 8/78 | Al-Imam ibn Abi Dunyah, [may Allāh bestow mercy upon him].
Translation: Authentic Quotes
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Parents, teach your children responsibility and discipline at home, as part of proper tarbiya.
When you coddle and baby your children because you want to avoid the difficult task of child-raising, you foist irresponsible and insufferable grown infants on society and force others to raise your children for you when it's way past the time for raising them.
Instead of this being your problem, you've made it everyone else's problem.
Not only is this unfair to society, it is unfair to your children, who were not raised properly and find themselves inept and incompetent as adults.
The solution is for parents to give their children the appropriate amount of love and mercy on the one hand, as well as "tough love" and justice on the other, and to instill in the children a sense of responsibility, accountability, and discipline.
Don't force society to teach all this to your children. If you can't bring yourself to be "harsh" with your children, know that society will be much harsher when teaching them these lessons.
The irony is that modern people consider a mother who stays home to raise her children properly "not contributing to society."
How ironic!
When you coddle and baby your children because you want to avoid the difficult task of child-raising, you foist irresponsible and insufferable grown infants on society and force others to raise your children for you when it's way past the time for raising them.
Instead of this being your problem, you've made it everyone else's problem.
Not only is this unfair to society, it is unfair to your children, who were not raised properly and find themselves inept and incompetent as adults.
The solution is for parents to give their children the appropriate amount of love and mercy on the one hand, as well as "tough love" and justice on the other, and to instill in the children a sense of responsibility, accountability, and discipline.
Don't force society to teach all this to your children. If you can't bring yourself to be "harsh" with your children, know that society will be much harsher when teaching them these lessons.
The irony is that modern people consider a mother who stays home to raise her children properly "not contributing to society."
How ironic!
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Teach your children from a young age that it isn't allowed for us to join Christmas parties or exchange gifts on these occasions; we only have two Eids, Eidul Fitr & Eidul Ad'ha.
علّموا أطفالكم من بداية صغرهم أنه ليس مسموحاً لنا الانضمام إلى حفلات عيد الميلاد أو تبادل الهدايا في هذه المناسبات؛ لدينا فقط عيدين، عيد الفطر وعيد الأضحى.
علّموا أطفالكم من بداية صغرهم أنه ليس مسموحاً لنا الانضمام إلى حفلات عيد الميلاد أو تبادل الهدايا في هذه المناسبات؛ لدينا فقط عيدين، عيد الفطر وعيد الأضحى.
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Muslim Children Tips
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Muslim Children Tips
"A woman should train her children properly, for her children represent the men and women of the future."
Shaykh Saalih ibn Uthaymeen (rahimahullaah)
from The Uprightness of a Woman.
Shaykh Saalih ibn Uthaymeen (rahimahullaah)
from The Uprightness of a Woman.
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To all the amazing Fathers!
May Allah bless you all with nothing but al firdous al alaa - Ameen!
📚 Abu Darda reported: The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “The father is the middle of the gates of Paradise. If you wish, you can squander this gate or keep to it.”
[Sunan al-Tirmidhī]
May Allah bless you all with nothing but al firdous al alaa - Ameen!
📚 Abu Darda reported: The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “The father is the middle of the gates of Paradise. If you wish, you can squander this gate or keep to it.”
[Sunan al-Tirmidhī]
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Useful Advice on Raising Children Which Will Have Good Consequences When the Child Grows Up
This is an excerpt from the book of: Imam Ibn Qayyim al-Jawziyyah (d. 751 AH), a famous book called Tuhfat al-Mawdood bi Ahkaam al-Mawlood. One of the most important chapters of his book is the sixteenth chapter, which is ennoscriptd Fi fusool naafi’ah fi Tarbiyat al-Atfaal tuhmad ‘awaaqibuha ‘ind al-Kabr (Useful advice on raising children which will have good consequences when the child grows up).
Here is a summary of what Ibn Qayyim said:
1. The child should be breastfed by someone other than his mother, two or three days after birth. That is better because her milk after that time will be thick and contain different ingredients, unlike the milk of one who has been breastfeeding for a while. All the Arabs pay attention to that, and they give their children to desert women to breastfeed, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was given to Banu Sa’d to be breastfed among them.
2. They should not be picked up and carried around until they are three months old or more, because they have only recently emerged from their mother’s wombs and their bodies are still weak.
3. They should be given only milk until their teeth appear, because their stomachs are weak and unable to digest food. When the baby’s teeth appear, his stomach has grown strong and is able to be nourished by food. Food should be introduced gradually.
4. When they approach the age where they will begin to speak and one wants to make it easy for them to speak, a little honey and salt should be placed on the infant’s tongue, because they contain substances that will reduce the excessive moisture that prevents speech. When the child begins to speak, one should prompt him to say Laa ilaaha ill-Allaah Muhammad Rasool Allaah.
5. When the time for the teeth to appear comes, the gums should be rubbed every day with butter and ghee.
6. Parents should not get upset when the child cries and yells, because he benefits greatly from that crying. It exercises his limbs, opens his intestines and chest, keeps his brain warm, warms his moods, provokes his energy, creates suitable conditions for expelling waste matter, and helps rid the brain of mucus and other waste.
7. The child should be protected against everything that may scare him of harsh and terrifying noises, frightening scenes and disturbing movements.
8. Complete breastfeeding lasts for two years. This is the right of the child if he needs it and cannot do without it. The Qur’aan confirmed that by adding the word kaamilayn (meaning complete or whole, in the verse “The mothers shall give suck to their children for two whole years” [al-Baqarah 2:233]). If the one who is breastfeeding the child wants to wean him, she should wean him gradually, and not wean him suddenly in one go; rather she should get him used to it slowly because of the harm that may be done by changing the child’s food and habit in one go.
9. It is mistreatment of children to allow them to eat their fill of food, and to eat and drink a lot. One of the most beneficial ways of training them is to give them less than their fill, so that they may digest well and be in good health, there will be less waste in their bodies and their bodies will be healthy, and they will have less sickness because of having less food waste in their bodies.
10. One thing that the child needs most urgently is close attention to his moral well being. He grows up with whatever the one who is raising him gets him used to when he is small. [If it is] resentment, anger, arguments, haste, being easily led by whims and desires, foolishness, hot-temperedness and greed, then it will be difficult for him to change that when he grows up. Hence you will find that most people are deviant in their character, because of the way they were brought up.
This is an excerpt from the book of: Imam Ibn Qayyim al-Jawziyyah (d. 751 AH), a famous book called Tuhfat al-Mawdood bi Ahkaam al-Mawlood. One of the most important chapters of his book is the sixteenth chapter, which is ennoscriptd Fi fusool naafi’ah fi Tarbiyat al-Atfaal tuhmad ‘awaaqibuha ‘ind al-Kabr (Useful advice on raising children which will have good consequences when the child grows up).
Here is a summary of what Ibn Qayyim said:
1. The child should be breastfed by someone other than his mother, two or three days after birth. That is better because her milk after that time will be thick and contain different ingredients, unlike the milk of one who has been breastfeeding for a while. All the Arabs pay attention to that, and they give their children to desert women to breastfeed, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was given to Banu Sa’d to be breastfed among them.
2. They should not be picked up and carried around until they are three months old or more, because they have only recently emerged from their mother’s wombs and their bodies are still weak.
3. They should be given only milk until their teeth appear, because their stomachs are weak and unable to digest food. When the baby’s teeth appear, his stomach has grown strong and is able to be nourished by food. Food should be introduced gradually.
4. When they approach the age where they will begin to speak and one wants to make it easy for them to speak, a little honey and salt should be placed on the infant’s tongue, because they contain substances that will reduce the excessive moisture that prevents speech. When the child begins to speak, one should prompt him to say Laa ilaaha ill-Allaah Muhammad Rasool Allaah.
5. When the time for the teeth to appear comes, the gums should be rubbed every day with butter and ghee.
6. Parents should not get upset when the child cries and yells, because he benefits greatly from that crying. It exercises his limbs, opens his intestines and chest, keeps his brain warm, warms his moods, provokes his energy, creates suitable conditions for expelling waste matter, and helps rid the brain of mucus and other waste.
7. The child should be protected against everything that may scare him of harsh and terrifying noises, frightening scenes and disturbing movements.
8. Complete breastfeeding lasts for two years. This is the right of the child if he needs it and cannot do without it. The Qur’aan confirmed that by adding the word kaamilayn (meaning complete or whole, in the verse “The mothers shall give suck to their children for two whole years” [al-Baqarah 2:233]). If the one who is breastfeeding the child wants to wean him, she should wean him gradually, and not wean him suddenly in one go; rather she should get him used to it slowly because of the harm that may be done by changing the child’s food and habit in one go.
9. It is mistreatment of children to allow them to eat their fill of food, and to eat and drink a lot. One of the most beneficial ways of training them is to give them less than their fill, so that they may digest well and be in good health, there will be less waste in their bodies and their bodies will be healthy, and they will have less sickness because of having less food waste in their bodies.
10. One thing that the child needs most urgently is close attention to his moral well being. He grows up with whatever the one who is raising him gets him used to when he is small. [If it is] resentment, anger, arguments, haste, being easily led by whims and desires, foolishness, hot-temperedness and greed, then it will be difficult for him to change that when he grows up. Hence you will find that most people are deviant in their character, because of the way they were brought up.
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11. The child’s guardian should keep him from taking from others because if he gets used to taking, that will become natural for him, and he will grow up as one who takes and not one who gives. If the guardian wants to give something, he should give it by his hand [i.e., give it to the child to give away] so that that he will taste the sweetness of giving.
12. He should keep him away from lying and treachery more than he would keep him away from lethal poison. Once he lets him get the habit of lying and betrayal, he will have corrupted his happiness in this world and in the Hereafter, and deprived him of all goodness.
13. He should keep him away from laziness, idleness, a life of ease and too much rest, and he should force him to do the opposite. He should not let him rest more than is sufficient to restore his energy so that he can do more work, for laziness and idleness bring bad consequences and lead to regret. Yahya ibn Abi Katheer said: “Knowledge cannot be attained by letting the body rest.”
14. He should get him used to waking up at the end of the night, for that is the time when reward is allocated and prizes are awarded; some will take less and some will take more and some will be deprived. If he gets used to that when he is little, it will be easy for him when he grows up.
[Tuhfat al-Mawdood (194-203)]
12. He should keep him away from lying and treachery more than he would keep him away from lethal poison. Once he lets him get the habit of lying and betrayal, he will have corrupted his happiness in this world and in the Hereafter, and deprived him of all goodness.
13. He should keep him away from laziness, idleness, a life of ease and too much rest, and he should force him to do the opposite. He should not let him rest more than is sufficient to restore his energy so that he can do more work, for laziness and idleness bring bad consequences and lead to regret. Yahya ibn Abi Katheer said: “Knowledge cannot be attained by letting the body rest.”
14. He should get him used to waking up at the end of the night, for that is the time when reward is allocated and prizes are awarded; some will take less and some will take more and some will be deprived. If he gets used to that when he is little, it will be easy for him when he grows up.
[Tuhfat al-Mawdood (194-203)]
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‼️Parents should be and must be mindful not to let their children participate in Christmas parties because it falls into SHIRK & BID'AH. Cultivate your children upon Islam, give them gifts on FRIDAY/S or in the days of two 'Eid. ‼️
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*💎 SEEKING ALLAH'S AID IN RAISING CHILDREN*
▪️In one of his tafseer lessons, Shaykh ‘Abd al-Razzaq al-Badr said:
*لا يمكن أن يصلح لك فرد من أفراد ذريتك إلا إذا أصلحه الله لك. مهما اجتهدت في تأديبه وتربيته وأطْرِهِ على الحق، والزامه بالاستقامة لا يمكن أن يستقيم ويَصلُح إلا إذا أصلحه الله لك. فالهادي هو الله، والموفق هو الله سبحانه وتعالى. ولهذا ينبغي على المسلم أن يَعْظُمَ رجاؤه بالله، وسؤاله لله، والحَاحُه على الله -سبحانه وتعالى- أن يصلح ذريته. فهاهو خليل الرحمن في دعائه يقول: {رَبَّنَا وَاجْعَلْنَا مُسْلِمَيْنِ لَكَ وَمِن ذُرِّيَّتِنَا أُمَّةً مُّسْلِمَةً لَّكَ}. ـ *
It is not possible for you to make any of your offspring upright unless Allah makes him upright for you.
No matter how hard you work to instill good manners in him, raise him right, make him receptive to the truth, and make him stick to upright behavior, it is not possible for him to be in good standing and upright unless Allah makes him upright for you.
For Allah is the guide. Allah is the One who gives success.
That is why a Muslim ought to give importance to placing his hopes on Allah, asking Allah, and his own reliance on Allah in making his offspring upright. That is why Khalil al-Rahman – Ibrahim عليه السلام – said in his supplication:
*رَبَّنَا وَاجْعَلْنَا مُسْلِمَيْنِ لَكَ وَمِن ذُرِّيَّتِنَا أُمَّةً مُّسْلِمَةً لَّكَ*
O our Lord, and make us both those who submit to you, and make out of our offspring a nation that submits to you [2:128]
[Class #8 of the sheikh’s explanation of the book Tafsir Ayaat al-Qur’an al-Kareem of Shaykh Muhammad ibn ‘Abd al-Wahhab] 📙
https://news.1rj.ru/str/MuslimChildrenTips
▪️In one of his tafseer lessons, Shaykh ‘Abd al-Razzaq al-Badr said:
*لا يمكن أن يصلح لك فرد من أفراد ذريتك إلا إذا أصلحه الله لك. مهما اجتهدت في تأديبه وتربيته وأطْرِهِ على الحق، والزامه بالاستقامة لا يمكن أن يستقيم ويَصلُح إلا إذا أصلحه الله لك. فالهادي هو الله، والموفق هو الله سبحانه وتعالى. ولهذا ينبغي على المسلم أن يَعْظُمَ رجاؤه بالله، وسؤاله لله، والحَاحُه على الله -سبحانه وتعالى- أن يصلح ذريته. فهاهو خليل الرحمن في دعائه يقول: {رَبَّنَا وَاجْعَلْنَا مُسْلِمَيْنِ لَكَ وَمِن ذُرِّيَّتِنَا أُمَّةً مُّسْلِمَةً لَّكَ}. ـ *
It is not possible for you to make any of your offspring upright unless Allah makes him upright for you.
No matter how hard you work to instill good manners in him, raise him right, make him receptive to the truth, and make him stick to upright behavior, it is not possible for him to be in good standing and upright unless Allah makes him upright for you.
For Allah is the guide. Allah is the One who gives success.
That is why a Muslim ought to give importance to placing his hopes on Allah, asking Allah, and his own reliance on Allah in making his offspring upright. That is why Khalil al-Rahman – Ibrahim عليه السلام – said in his supplication:
*رَبَّنَا وَاجْعَلْنَا مُسْلِمَيْنِ لَكَ وَمِن ذُرِّيَّتِنَا أُمَّةً مُّسْلِمَةً لَّكَ*
O our Lord, and make us both those who submit to you, and make out of our offspring a nation that submits to you [2:128]
[Class #8 of the sheikh’s explanation of the book Tafsir Ayaat al-Qur’an al-Kareem of Shaykh Muhammad ibn ‘Abd al-Wahhab] 📙
https://news.1rj.ru/str/MuslimChildrenTips
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MOTHERHOOD IS ONE OF THE GREATEST QUALITIES OF WOMEN
Motherhood is one of the greatest and prestigious qualities of women. Allāh ordained various rulings that stem from motherhood; rulings related to pregnancy, breastfeeding, kindness, mercy, and other matters of this sort that flow out of her heart. Not to mention her overwhelming emotions towards her children; she is the one who carries, breastfeed, educate them, and stay sleepless for the sake of their comfort. Accordingly, Allāh rewarded her with making Paradise under her feet.
Book: Contributions Of The Muslim Woman in Giving Sincere Advice
By Shaykh Doctor Ridā bin Khālid Būshāmah
Translated by Abdullah Omrān
Maktabatulirshad Publications
P. 23
Motherhood is one of the greatest and prestigious qualities of women. Allāh ordained various rulings that stem from motherhood; rulings related to pregnancy, breastfeeding, kindness, mercy, and other matters of this sort that flow out of her heart. Not to mention her overwhelming emotions towards her children; she is the one who carries, breastfeed, educate them, and stay sleepless for the sake of their comfort. Accordingly, Allāh rewarded her with making Paradise under her feet.
Book: Contributions Of The Muslim Woman in Giving Sincere Advice
By Shaykh Doctor Ridā bin Khālid Būshāmah
Translated by Abdullah Omrān
Maktabatulirshad Publications
P. 23
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We all have to face reality. It does not mean being pessimistic. Rather, facing reality is essential. Reality is harsh and tough, full of struggle. And if accepting this makes me pessimistic, then it's better than living your life in continuous fantasy. Fantasy is not just thinking big; it means your aim in life may not be so big or flashy, but at the same time, you are seeking to achieve a status that is continuously fueled by your ignorance. It means you keep ignoring or making yourself forget the harshness of this world; you actually cannot even address it as "harshness" or "tough"; this is what it is. This world can make you forget the remembrance of your Lord. This very world can make you forget who you are and what your true purpose is. This very world is to test you. So, do you think the one who is deluded in these worldly desires thinks this world is harsh or nothing but delusion? No, he is the same parasite; this is what he wants. So, he does whatever it takes for him to get power, wealth, money. He wants this so that he can make other people feel worthless.
So what makes "pessimistic"? Me denying this worldview? Or not aiming as that parasite? You have to face reality without sugarcoating it, without thinking this world will ever give you anything. Living for the sake of Allah is what makes you human. We can argue about what is right or wrong; it's all just a waste of time. There is no right or wrong except what Allah has declared as right or wrong.
These words are especially for men. Many now fantasize about marriage way too much than it is. Trust me; nothing is wrong with getting married. Wallahi, I do know. Having a righteous wife or wives is one of the greatest blessings you can have in this dunya. No doubt, they bring sukun and calmness. But realize, this is not life. If you give all your love to your wife and go extreme in loving her, trust me, I have seen many who love their wives madly, and they leave haqq just because "his wife does not want that." Stay away from this level; this is a trial. Trust me, akhi; no one loves you without conditions. As Allah said in the Quran,
"O believers! Do not let your wealth or your children divert you from the remembrance of Allah. For whoever does so, it is they who are the true losers." (Quran 63:9)
"O believers! Indeed, some of your spouses and children are enemies to you...." (Quran 64:14)
"Your wealth and your children are but a trial, and Allah has with Him a great reward." (Quran 64:15)
So what makes "pessimistic"? Me denying this worldview? Or not aiming as that parasite? You have to face reality without sugarcoating it, without thinking this world will ever give you anything. Living for the sake of Allah is what makes you human. We can argue about what is right or wrong; it's all just a waste of time. There is no right or wrong except what Allah has declared as right or wrong.
These words are especially for men. Many now fantasize about marriage way too much than it is. Trust me; nothing is wrong with getting married. Wallahi, I do know. Having a righteous wife or wives is one of the greatest blessings you can have in this dunya. No doubt, they bring sukun and calmness. But realize, this is not life. If you give all your love to your wife and go extreme in loving her, trust me, I have seen many who love their wives madly, and they leave haqq just because "his wife does not want that." Stay away from this level; this is a trial. Trust me, akhi; no one loves you without conditions. As Allah said in the Quran,
"O believers! Do not let your wealth or your children divert you from the remembrance of Allah. For whoever does so, it is they who are the true losers." (Quran 63:9)
"O believers! Indeed, some of your spouses and children are enemies to you...." (Quran 64:14)
"Your wealth and your children are but a trial, and Allah has with Him a great reward." (Quran 64:15)
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